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    Correction of a text on Animal Farm (1)

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    Correction of a text on Animal Farm
    Message de loupevivante posté le 12-03-2009 à 18:38:34 (S | E | F)

    Could you correct my mistakes in this text too? Thank you..

    He (the author) must have had a fertile imagination to have written such a story. Giving animals such human characteristics and developing everyone’s character in depth(thorough) is not an easy thing to do. However, George Orwell carried out that huge task with brilliance. Through his character's behaviour, this famous author popularized one of the most important twenty century realities, a historic event. He allowed, thanks to his talent, the population to understand that complex phenomenon. By reading this book, through its lines, you will be opening up to the outside world, to realize some international stakes and their raison d’etre. You will get the timeliness to solve some previous and actual conflicts, to analyze them and their relevance. In brief, you will grow up on your moral aspect. Your comprehension of the world will improve and become more profound. You will discover every Russian Revolution and communist government applications secrets…


    Réponse: Correction of a text on Animal Farm de brettdallen, postée le 12-03-2009 à 20:39:31 (S | E)
    Bonsoir,
    C'est du bon travail, je ne corrigerai donc que peu de points..


    He (the author) must have had a fertile imagination to have written(d'accord ou sinon "write") such a story. Giving animals such human characteristics and developing everyone’s character in depth(thorough(si vous utilisez ce mot, sous forme adverbiale: "thoroughly")) is not an easy thing to do. However, George Orwell carried out that huge task with brilliance. Through his character's("characters'"?) behaviour(auquel cas: "behaviours"), this famous author popularized(est-ce le bon verbe?) one of the most important twenty century realities, a historic event(vous auriez dû le citer!). He allowed, thanks to his talent(placez cela au début de la phrase), the population to understand that complex phenomenon(lequel? vous donnez l'impression de jouer avec vos lecteur..). By reading this book, through its lines, you will be opening up to the outside world, to (relié à quoi? problème de syntaxe)realize some international stakes(d'accord, ou "issues") and their raison d’etre. You will get the timeliness to solve some previous and actual conflicts, to analyze them and their relevance. In brief, you will grow up on your moral aspect. Your comprehension of the world will improve and become more profound. You will discover every Russian Revolution and communist government applications secrets…

    Cordialement.


    Réponse: Correction of a text on Animal Farm de loupevivante, postée le 13-03-2009 à 01:09:36 (S | E)
    This is better...?

    He (the author) must have had a fertile imagination to have written such a story. Giving animals such human characteristics and developing everyone’s character thoroughly is not an easy thing to do. However, George Orwell carried out that huge task with brilliance. Through his characters behaviours, this famous author popularized one of the most important twenty century realities, a historic event. Thanks to his talent, he allowed the population to understand that complex phenomenon. By reading this book, through its lines, you will be opening up to the outside world. You will realize some international stakes (issues) and their raison d’etre. You will get the timeliness to solve some previous and actual conflicts, to analyze them and their relevance. In brief, you will grow up on your moral aspect. Your comprehension of the world will improve and become more profound. You will discover every Russian Revolution and communist government secret applications…



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