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    D M/ Letter to a friend

    << Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

    [POSTER UNE NOUVELLE REPONSE] [Suivre ce sujet]


    D M/ Letter to a friend
    Message de elmadrilene posté le 24-09-2010 à 20:31:44 (S | E | F)
    Bonsoir,
    j'ai un Devoir Maison pour la semaine prochaine qui consiste à écrire une lettre de ses vacances à son ami. Donc j'ai écrit la lettre et je vous demande si possible de me dire les erreurs qui y figurent. Merci pour vos réponses.

    Hey dude, how it’s going?

    I hope you are having fun in Paris! I’m writing to you to tell you about my holiday. During these holidays, I was in… LOS ANGELES!!! Yes bro!!! And more precisely in HOLLYWOOD!!! It was awesome! When I arrived in LAX (the airport of Los Angeles), everything was wonderful: the weather, the cars and even, the girls… Furthermore, people are of a kind incredible. I stayed in a hotel with swimming pool near of the famous boulevard, Hollywood boulevard.

    But the most incredible was the visit to Universal Studio, where they do films.
    It was fantastic! I learned a lot of techniques about special effects so it was funny and enriching. I saw where they turned your favorite series, Desperate Housewives.
    In fact the series is turned in a phantom district specially created for it. Then, I made an incredible attraction on the theme of Simpson.

    Otherwise I was also in VENICE BEACH in particular in the principal avenue which is incredible because people are so simple, dress as they want and where there is a heap of street shows and unusual.

    Finally, the best rest the visit of the staple center where there was the ceremony for Michael Jackson who was, you know it, my favorite artist! And you know what?! On the Hollywood boulevard, to keep him in my thoughts, I took a photo on his star and with his double! That was a very moving moment and I know well that there will be never two as him! Moreover, I put a rose and a word on his star …

    Otherwise, Los Angeles has there not to say, it’s really a heaven on Earth.

    See you later,
    KARIM xxx

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 24-09-2010 20:59

    + titre



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de gerondif, postée le 24-09-2010 à 22:28:45 (S | E)
    Bonsoir,

    Certaines de vos tournures sont traduites mot-à mot du français très mécaniquement et n'ont aucun sens: en fait, pour moi qui les travaille à l'envers, c'est un jeu de devinettes pour retrouver l'original, par exemple:
    bleu = erreur
    Les gens sont d'une gentillesse incroyable: people are of a kind incredible.
    près du boulevard: near of the famous boulevard,
    Il y a un tas de: there is a heap of street shows and unusual.
    tourner un film: to turn a film (correction de notrepère)

    Le mieux reste la visite de: the best rest the visit of

    Autrement, Los Angelès, il n'y a pas à dire, c'est vraiment le paradis sur terre:Otherwise, Los Angeles has there not to say, it’s really a heaven on Earth.

    Sinon, on sent un certain enthousiasme dans votre texte:

    Hey dude, how it’s going?(forme interrogative)

    I hope you are having fun in Paris! I’m writing to you to tell you about my holiday. During these holidays, I was in… LOS ANGELES!!! Yes bro!!! And more precisely in HOLLYWOOD!!! It was awesome! When I arrived in LAX (the airport of Los Angeles), everything was wonderful: the weather, the cars and even, the girls… Furthermore, people are of a kind incredible. I stayed in a hotel with a swimming pool near of the famous boulevard, Hollywood boulevard.

    But the most incredible was the visit to Universal Studio (pluriel normalement), where they do films.
    It was fantastic! I learned a lot of techniques about special effects so it was funny and enriching. I saw where they turned your favorite series, Desperate Housewives.
    In fact the series is turned in a phantom district specially created for it. Then, I made an incredible attraction (sens? aller sur un manège ?)on the theme of Simpson (pluriel?).

    Otherwise I was also in VENICE BEACH in particular in the principal avenue (français traduit)which is incredible because people are so simple, dress as they want and where there is a heap of street shows and unusual (que fait cet adjectif isolé tout seul en fin de phrase ?).

    Finally, the best rest the visit of the staple center where there was (ou il y eut, français traduit, essayez l'expression to take place, se dérouler)the ceremony for Michael Jackson who was, you know it(you know that est plus courant), my favorite artist! And you know what?! On the Hollywood boulevard, to keep him in my thoughts, I took a photo on his star and with his double! That was a very moving moment and I know well (je sais bien I understand, I realize)that there will be never two as(like) him! Moreover, I put a rose and a word(un seul mot, mot-à-mot,vous vouliez dire un message, une note, une lettre) on his star …

    Otherwise, Los Angeles has there not to say, it’s really a heaven on Earth.

    je vous fournis une expression: Let's face it, L. A. is... ! il faut bien se rendre à l'évidence,.... pour remplacer cette dernière expression "ya pas à dire....."

    See you later,
    KARIM xxx



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de notrepere, postée le 25-09-2010 à 00:58:47 (S | E)
    Hello!

    [Gerondif, you must cringe at this colloquial-it-ain't-the-Queen's-English. I see you've overlooked many grammatical errors for the sake of colloquialism. You are becoming a regular americanophone.]

    Just a couple of additions to Gerondif's fine correction:

    the airport of Los Angeles (pas naturel) = Los Angeles International Airport

    funny and enriching (Je pense que vous voulez dire: fun and enriching)

    I saw where they turned [bizarre: choisissez un autre verbe] your favorite series ... In fact the series is turned

    on the theme [OK, but do you mean 'set'?] of the Simpsons

    Finally, the best rest the visit of (to) the Staple Center where there was the ceremony...

    I think what you mean is "the best part of the visit" ...

    Cordialement





    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de gerondif, postée le 25-09-2010 à 08:51:00 (S | E)
    Hello, np,

    Yea, man, I did overlook a few mistakes, we say "tourner un film", so I missed it, in English , you shoot a film, you make a film.
    And fun is much better than funny, which I also missed!



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de lucile83, postée le 25-09-2010 à 15:03:24 (S | E)
    Hello elmadrilene,

    Non, à vous de retravailler sur les 2 corrections
    Best wishes.



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de elmadrilene, postée le 25-09-2010 à 15:05:03 (S | E)
    Bonjour,

    ok ,je vais le refaire là et je le reposterai afin de voir s'il y a des choses à changer. Merci.

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 25-09-2010 15:07



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de elmadrilene, postée le 25-09-2010 à 15:31:23 (S | E)
    Voilà, merci j'ai re-corrigé mon travail grâce à vos deux corrections, donc je vous laisse regarder si des erreurs percites persistent, merci.

    Hey dude, how is it going?

    I hope you are having fun in Paris! I’m writing to you to tell you about my holiday. During these holidays, I was in… LOS ANGELES!!! Yes bro!!! And more precisely in HOLLYWOOD!!! It was awesome! When I arrived in LAX (Los Angeles International Airport), everything was wonderful: the weather, the cars and even, the girls… Furthermore, people are of an incredible kindness. I stayed in a hotel with a swimming pool near of the famous boulevard, Hollywood boulevard.

    But the most incredible was the visit to Universal Studios, where they make films.
    It was fantastic! I learned a lot of techniques about special effects so it was fun and enriching. I saw where they realized your favorite series, Desperate Housewives.
    In fact the series takes place in a phantom district specially created for it. Then, I made an incredible attraction(il s'agit enfaite d'un manège en rapport avec les Simpson) on the theme of Simpson.

    Otherwise I was also in VENICE BEACH in particular in the main avenue which is incredible because people are so simple, dress as they like and where there is a heap of street (je veux dire par là des tas de pectacles de rues)shows and unusual (je veux dire par là "des insolites" je ne sais pas par quoi remplacer car même dans mon dico on me donne "unusual").

    Finally, the best part of the visit of the Staple Center where took place the ceremony for Michael Jackson who was, you know that, my favorite artist! And you know what?! On the Hollywood boulevard, to keep him in my thoughts, I took a photo on his star and with his double! That was a very moving moment and I realize that there will be never two like him! Moreover, I put a rose and a message on his star …

    Let’s face it, L.A is really a heaven on Earth.
    See you later,
    KARIM xxx

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 25-09-2010 16:56



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de benboom, postée le 25-09-2010 à 16:50:46 (S | E)


    We'd never say "people of an incredible kindness". Maybe what you mean is "people are incredibly kind". (This is, after all, a work of fiction so you could get away with describing LA this way ) On the other hand, "people of an incredible kind" is an interesting phrase, but I doubt that's what you mean.



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de gerondif, postée le 25-09-2010 à 18:56:48 (S | E)
    Hello,
    Hey dude, how is it going?

    I hope you are having fun in Paris! I’m writing to you to tell you about my holiday. During these holidays, I was in… LOS ANGELES!!! Yes bro!!! And more precisely in HOLLYWOOD!!! It was awesome! When I arrived in LAX (Los Angeles International Airport), everything was wonderful: the weather, the cars and even, the girls… Furthermore, people are(gardez kind et mettez incredible en forme adverbiale) of an incredible kindness. I stayed in a hotel with a swimming pool near of the famous boulevard, Hollywood boulevard.

    But the most incredible was the visit to Universal Studios, where they make films.
    It was fantastic! I learned a lot of techniques about special effects so it was fun and enriching. I saw where they realized your favorite series, Desperate Housewives.
    In fact the series takes place in a phantom district specially created for it. Then, I made an incredible attraction(il s'agit enfaite d'un manège en rapport avec les Simpson) on the theme of ***Simpson(pluriel).

    Otherwise I was also in VENICE BEACH in particular in the main avenue which is incredible because people are so simple, dress as they like and where there is(à mettre au pluriel) a heap of(mettez un "beaucoup de" normal) street shows and unusual (appliquez cet adjectif à shows)

    Finally, the best part of the trip WAS the visit of the Staple Center where took place (mettez le sujet avant le verbe)the ceremony for Michael Jackson who was, you know that, my favorite artist! And you know what?! On the Hollywood boulevard, to keep him in my thoughts, I took a photo on his star and with his double! That was a very moving moment and I realize that there will be never two like him! Moreover, I put a rose and a message on his star …

    Let’s face it, L.A is really a heaven on Earth.
    See you later,




    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de elmadrilene, postée le 25-09-2010 à 20:22:34 (S | E)
    Merci

    Mais je n'ai pas compris comment mettre incredible en forme adverbiale tout en gardant kind.

    Pour "near of the famous" au traducteur cela correspond bien à "près de"... donc je devrais remplacer par "to" ?

    ensuite, "there are a heap of a lot of street unusual shows";

    "where the ceremony for MJ took place"

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 25-09-2010 22:29



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de may, postée le 26-09-2010 à 02:24:09 (S | E)

    Bonsoir,



    But the most incredible ( ) was the visit to Universal Studios, where they make films.

    It seems that a Noun was missing, or the most incredible visit.....





    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de notrepere, postée le 26-09-2010 à 07:03:44 (S | E)
    Bonjour!

    "Mais je n'ai pas compris comment mettre incredible en forme adverbiale tout en gardant kind."

    adverb: incredibly

    People are incredibly kind.

    Cordialement



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de gerondif, postée le 26-09-2010 à 10:27:26 (S | E)
    Bonjour,

    he is sitting near * me, next to me (* pas de of), beside me, at my side.

    There are a lot of /lots of/ plenty of/ a whole lot of / unusual street shows.



    Réponse: D M/ Letter to a friend de elmadrilene, postée le 26-09-2010 à 11:30:24 (S | E)
    Bonjour,

    je vous remercie pour vos réponses .

    Au revoir




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