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    Essay

    << Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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    Essay
    Message de mathjulie posté le 12-01-2011 à 13:31:40 (S | E | F)
    Bonjour, j'ai un essai à faire, est-ce que vous pourriez corriger mes erreurs s'il vous plaît? Voici ce que j'ai rédigé:
    il porte sur l'impact que peuvent avoir les parents sur la futur profession de leur enfant,

    Employ is in crise, it's very difficult to find a job even if we are hight qualified, but it's necessary because of the hight cost of life. Thus the careeradvice are very important for teenagers. Worried about economical contexta lot of parents interfere with there children's decision what it could their children go study far away, are selfish (egoistic) be dangerous. We could wonder what should induce parents to influence their children in the futur profession ?

    -We can see parents are inclined to influence for many reasons. On parents mind, teenagers aren't enough mature to chose their futurejob, so parents are worried about they don't manage in their life or don't make the good choice. In effect, parent's have lived more expérience and know better life traps. They could prevent children from the mistakes not to do ( à ne poas faire).
    -They want the best for their children, this love make they can't help interfering with the guidance. they are xorried for their future project and hope a bright future.
    -Parents want their children be safe and secure so that their children job is a good way ( moyen) to control their future to ensure (assurer) a calm life.

    -Besides this trend (tendency) could at times prove (turn out) dangerous.
    -Many parents put pressure on their children and are too demanding trying to impose their will on their children. They could make their children unhappy and spoil childhood of their children.
    -Parent's overprotective don't accept their children go study far away, they are selfish (egoistic) prefer have their children at their sides rather (instead) make the sudies they love.
    Because parents and children don't have the same hobbies, tastes, so parent's could encourage and convince their children to do a job they think good, but that prove (s'avérer) unfulfilling for their children and that they could regret the rest of their life.
    -Parents tansfere their career project to their childrens.
    -parents who have fulfilling and hight qualified job want a lot of time (le plus souvent) their childrens practise the same job.
    -Panrents are too demanding and don't respect the capacities of their children, who could be traumatized, it's useless because they west time in their suties.
    -It coukld create tension within the family , because if the children is determined, independant, he wants to live his own life and doesn't want to bind at the décision ( seplier à la décision) of his parents.

    To conclude, a lot of parents interfere with the career project of their children for reason more or less legitimate. The choice of the guidance is very important I think parents have a role to play but they don't have to impose their will.

    Merci d'avance pour vos réponses.

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 12-01-2011 19:05



    Réponse: Essay de dsmith, postée le 12-01-2011 à 14:36:45 (S | E)
    Bonjour,

    Voici quelques corrections pour la première partie.

    Employ (il faut une autre forme de ce mot - chercher embauche dans le dictionnaire) is in crise (il faut traduire ce mot en anglais), it's very difficult to find a job even if we are hight (il faut l'adverbe de "high") qualified, but it's necessary because of the hight (misspelled) cost of life. Thus the careeradvice (deux mots) are (singular) very important for teenagers. Worried about (il faut l'article définitif) economical contexta(espace entre le mot context et "a") lot of parents interfere with there (misspelled) children's decision what it could (whether) their children go study far away. are selfish (egoistic) be dangerous (Je n'ai pas vraiment compris cette phrase). We could wonder what should induce parents to influence their children in the futur (misspelled) profession ?



    Réponse: Essay de alphonse46, postée le 12-01-2011 à 15:35:47 (S | E)
    Bonjour, mathjulie
    En complément des remarques de Dsmith,

    to chose their futurejob,
    parent's have lived
    they are xorried
    Parent's overprotective
    so parent's could encourage
    their childrens practise
    Panrents are too demanding
    they west time in their suties.
    It coukld create tension
    because if the children is determined,
    he wants to live his own life and doesn't want
    bind at the décision of his parents

    Bonne continuation
    .






    Réponse: Essay de mathjulie, postée le 12-01-2011 à 16:26:01 (S | E)
    D'accord, merci beaucoup donc j'ai compris ces erreurs mais pourriez vous m'aider pour le reste de mon texte,

    Merci d'avance



    Réponse: Essay de may, postée le 13-01-2011 à 02:06:42 (S | E)
    Bonsoir,

    Je suis la correction d'alphonse46

    and doesn't want (to bind at) to be + verbe bind (participe passé) by..


    interfere with their children's choice of career..??

    Je pense que c'est mieux d'écrire le texte en entier avec toutes les corrections.

    Bonne nuit,






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