Correction/obsolescence

Correction/obsolescence
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Correction/obsolescence
Message de juju356 posté le 09-12-2012 à 21:24:34 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,

Pouvez-vous m'aider s'il vous plaît?
Pourriez-vous corriger le résumé suivant:

This video is about planned obsolescence and perceived obsolescence. Ms _____ start by deals with planned obsolescence. Planned obsolescence is a word who mean make for the bin. Manufacturer want that his product is break the faster possible because if the customer is enough satisfied with this product, he return buy a product in the same shop.
We can think that they make this strategies for little object whereas they make this for all. Computer, barbecue… For example todays a computer is efficient approximately two years because the technology progress quickly. Ms _____ say that only one piece changes all the years but this piece is always make with different forms and it is a very important piece.
Then there are perceived obsolescence. Objects don’t break fast enough so Designers thought at perceived obsolescence. This form of obsolescence consists at make new models that are in fashion. New models aren’t more performing that ancient model but more beautiful. When you see on the desk of your colleague all his material is matching you want the same thing. It’s functioning of perceived obsolescence. Ms _____ takes as example spike heel and large heel. She says that if you put large heel one year where the fashion is spike heel you are considered as out of fashion. The fashion is dictated by media in particularly with the advertisements. In U.S.A you see more advertisements in one year that someone lived in 1950 have seen during all his live.

Merci d'avance pour vos réponses.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 09-12-2012 21:42

Réponse: Correction/obsolescence de robertbrou, postée le 11-12-2012 à 18:15:31 (S | E)
Bonjour,

Je suggère que vous lisiez un texte en anglais sur le sujet. Je ne suis pas sûr si j'ai(e) tout marqué/d'avoir tout indiqué/contrôlé, mais c'est un début. Les corrections vertes/en vert sont offertes. Revoir ce qui est en rose. Pour les ( ? ) et les expressions soulignées, je ne suis pas sûr de ce que vous (veuillez)voulez dire.

This video is about planned obsolescence and perceived obsolescence. Ms _____ start (temps) by deals with planned obsolescence. Planned obsolescence is a word who mean make for the bin (revoir l'expression). Manufacturers want that his product is break the faster possible because if the customer is enough satisfied with it ~~this product~~, he return buy a product in the same shop. (tout refaire)

We can think that they make (utiliser synonyme) this strategies for little object whereas they make (revoir "faire") this for all (préciser: everybody? everything?), such as computers, barbecue grills, etc. (en citant des examples en anglais, vous devez commencer par "like", "such as", ou bien "For example, xxx, yyy, and zzz are considered ... " For example, todays a computer (today's computer or today a computer?) is efficient (mot manquant) approximately two years because the technology progress (temps) quickly. Ms _____ say (temps) that only one piece (revoir pièce) changes all the years (revoir chaque année) but this piece (idem) is always make with different forms and it is a very important ~~piece~~.

Then there are(temps) perceived obsolescence. Objects don't break fast enough so Designers thought at perceived obsolescence. This form of obsolescence consists at make (utiliser gérondif) new models that are in fashion. New models aren't more performing (revoir performant) that ancient (faux ami) model but (verbe manquant) more beautiful. When you see on the desk of your colleague all his material is matching you want the same thing. It's functioning of perceived obsolescence. Ms _____ takes as an example (placement) spike heels (revoir talons aguilles) and large heels (revoir gros talons). She says that if you put (revoir porter) large heels (idem) one year where the fashion is spike heels (idem) you are considered as out of fashion. ~~The~~ Fashion is dictated by the media in particularly with ~~the~~ advertisements. In the U.S.A. you see more advertisements in one year that someone(pronom manquant) lived in 1950 have (temps; someone=one) seen during ~~all~~ his entire live (orthographe).
Hope this helps!

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Modifié par willy le 11-12-2012 20:37

Réponse: Correction/obsolescence de juju356, postée le 12-12-2012 à 19:01:32 (S | E)
Bonjour,

Merci pour votre réponse
J'ai pris en compte vos corrections; est-ce plus correct maintenant?

This video is about planned obsolescence and perceived obsolescence. Ms ____ starts by talking about planned obsolescence. Planned obsolescence is another word to design for trash. Manufacturers want the product is broken as soon as possible because if the customer is quite satisfied with it, he returns buy a new product in the same shop.

We can think that they use this strategy for small object whereas they use this for all, like computer, barbecue grills… For example today a computer is efficient approximately two years because the technology develop quickly. Ms ____ says that only one part changes every years but this part is always made with different shapes and it is a very important part.

Then there are perceived obsolescence. Objects don’t break quickly enough so the designers have thought at the perceived obsolescence. This form of obsolescence consists at making new models that are in fashion. New models aren’t more efficient that previous model but they are more beautiful. When you see on the desk of your colleague all his material is beautiful (fashion) you want the same thing. It is perceived obsolescence. Ms ____ takes as an example stiletto heels and wedge heels. She says that if you wear wedge heels one year where the fashion is spike heels you are considered out of fashion. Fashion is dictated by the media particularly with advertisements. In the U.S.A you see more advertisements in one year that someone who lived in 1950 has seen during all his entire life.

Merci d'avance.

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