Accueil du site pour apprendre le français Créer un test / 1 leçon par semaine
Connectez-vous !

Cliquez ici pour vous connecter
Nouveau compte
4 millions de comptes créés

100% gratuit !
[Avantages]

  • Accueil
  • Accès rapides
  • Imprimer
  • Livre d'or
  • Plan du site
  • Recommander
  • Signaler un bug
  • Faire un lien

  • Comme des milliers de personnes, recevez gratuitement chaque semaine une leçon de français !





    > Publicités :




    > Recommandés:
    -Jeux gratuits
    -Nos autres sites
       



    Correction/autisme

    Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

    [POSTER UNE NOUVELLE REPONSE] [Suivre ce sujet]


    Correction/autisme
    Message de podologue posté le 15-03-2013 à 11:37:55 (S | E | F)
    Bonjour,

    je cherche quelqu'un qui aurait la grande gentillesse de m'aider pour ce texte que j'ai eu beaucoup de mal à rédiger.
    Je ne demande pas une correction de toutes mes fautes mais seulement des principales !!
    C'est un sujet d'anglais que j'ai à rendre pour jeudi 21 mars.
    Merci pour votre aide, je vous en serais éternellement reconnaissante !!

    1-Introduction :
    Autism is a developmental disorder characterized by human social interaction and an abnormal communication with restricted and repetitive behavior.
    The exact causes of these abnormalities remain unknown, but it is a very active area of research. There is probably a combination of factors that lead to autism. Genetic factors appear to play an important role.
    There is no cure or medication for now but behavioral therapy and occupational therapy and speech therapy in this disease are used to increase communication, autonomy, and opportunities to acquire language.
    I chose this topic because this disease, that is considered as a disability, is widespread: 1 of 100 births is affected by autism, and no cure has been found.
    Indeed, behavioral therapies exist but despite that, a lot of people do not acquire the language and is excluded from the social world throughout their lives.
    It is a rare disease common whose cause is not yet clear.
    For me this disease is a mystery. In addition, this is a disease that is very hard for the patient to live but also for his family who is obliged to assist and help him all his life. It is for all these reasons that I wanted to explore this topic.

    2-Summary:
    Autism is a very common disease that affects one in 100 children at birth. 650,000 people are affected in France.
    But the causes of this disease are still not precisely known. Many studies have been done to resolve this issue.
    In particular, the study by David G. Amaral who is the principal investigator of the phenomenon Autism Project.
    This study has been shown that the causes of this disease could be genetic, immunological or in connection with the development of the brain. This is what we see in the analysis of the first text.
    Another cause that speak many scientists is the hypothesis of the "new sanitized world". We suffer from the elimination of parasites and microbial deprivation could result in a immune dysregulation That may Increase the risk of autism. This is what we see in the second text.
    There is no drug therapy to treat autism. But considering the magnitude of the disease, which is very debilitating, many cheurcheurs trying to find a drug that cures or improve the condition of patients. Studies in mice have shown encouraging results. But it is difficult to switch from animal model to humans. This is what we see in the last text.

    3-Analysis :

    Text 1 : « With Autism, One Size Doesn’t Fit All » :
    The information provided in this document are reliable. The author is AMY LENNARD GOEHNER, she asked David G. Amaral, the director of research at the M.I.N.D. institute at the University of California, Davis, and the principal investigator of the Autism Phenome Project.
    This article appeared in the New York Times, an editorial control has been made.
    The target of this paper is to distinguish between different types of autism and to understand the mechanisms of this desease.
    This document is intended for a wide audience, but I think it is better understood by an enlightened public and by the scientific community.
    The information is presented as a scientific paper clear and complete. It is a dialogue between the author, Amy Lennard Goehner, and David G. Amaral the principal investigator of the Autism Phenome Project.
    David G. Amaral is the director of research at the M.I.N.D. institute at the University of California, Davis, and the principal investigator of the Autism Phenome Project.
    The goal of this project is to distinguish the different types of autism to understand the mechanisms leading to the disease and therefore the objectives and targets of therapeutic treatment.
    In fact, autism is heterogeneous, it translates differently: children can be reached severe developmental delays, but others are normal or improved IQ aves, some epilepsy, mental retardation or problems gastrointestinal. Autism would have multiple causes and constitute different types: some of these types can be defined genetically, others by the model of brain development and others by the presence of immune abnormalities.
    Regarding the development of the brain, the frontal lobe and amygdala, appear to have abnormal growth patterns. The amygdala, for example, control is subjected to an acceleration of growth resulting from abnormal connections. The amygdala would grow out of sync with the rest of the brain.
    Genetics is also implicated in autism. There is no gene for autism but there are only 20 genes that are risk factors. Some of these risk factors are hereditary, but it can also produce genetic mutations in the design.
    There would also be environmental triggers which act on genes related to the immune system. This could lead to a change in brain development. Investigators Demonstrated That families who use flea and tick powder on Their pets: slightly Increase the risk.
    This study helps to understand the mechanisms leading to the disease. The ultimate goal is to find therapeutic targets for future treatment.

    Text 2 : « An Immune Disorder at the Root of Autism » :
    The information provided in this document are reliable. The author is Moises Velasquez-Manoff is the author of "An Epidemic of Absence: A New Way of Understanding Allergies and Autoimmune Diseases."
    It is based only on doctors, scientists and specialized studies in autism, as scientists at the MIND Institute, a research center for neurodevelopmental disorders at the University of California, Research of Paul Patterson, an expert in neuroimmunity at Caltech, Kevin Becker, a geneticist at the National Institutes of Health, and trial of the Montefiore Medical Center and the Albert Einstein College.
    This article appeared in the New York Times, an editorial control has been made.
    The target of this paper is to understand what are the causes and therefore the therapeutic result of autism. This document is intended for a wide audience, but I think it is better understood by an enlightened public and by the scientific community.
    The information is presented as a scientific paper clear and complete. The author expresses his opinion in favor of studies and scientific data that explains in his article.
    Normally, our immune system protects us with an optimal balance between pro and anti-inflammatory systems. In people with autism, this balance is disturbed. Indeed, proinflammatory molecules undergo chronic activation.
    This deregulation would affect brain cells. this would mean that there would be a therapeutic target.
    Scientists believe that infection during pregnancy increases the risk of autism in children. Indeed, a viral infection during the first trimester or bacterial infection during the second trimester of pregnancy increase the risk.
    Studies have also proven that inflammatory diseases, asthma or allergies of the mother increases the risk of autism in children.
    Autism disorders are a consequence of self-defense in the immune system of the mother during pregnancy.
    According to scientific studies, diseases of immune irregularity related to autism increased over the last sixty years. Autism seems less common in the developing world.
    Indeed, in environments that resemble the world of yore, the immune system is much less prone to diseases of dysregulation.
    It could be that we suffer deprivation microbial. Elimination of parasites have led to immune suppression and would have left us prone to inflammation.
    It would be beneficial to strengthen the anti-inflammatory signal. A probiotic would be beneficial.
    A trial is under way at the Montefiore medical center and the Albert Einstein college of medecine testing a medicalized parasite called trichuris suis in autistic adults.
    The whipworm has anecdotally shown benefit in autistic children.
    The conclusion is that, microbes, parasites and viruses are not necessarily the danger to us. On the contrary, without them, our immune system is deregulated and leads to the onset of inflammatory diseases that may increase the risk of autism.

    Text 3 : « Prospect of 'autism drug' raised after early tests » :
    The information provided in this document are reliable. The author is James Gallagher, he is Health and science reporter.
    The author takes as source : studies and research from the U.S. National Institutes of health, the journal "Science transnational medicine." It is also based on statements by Uta Frith, a professor of cognitive development at University College London, Dr. Jacqueline Crawley, a researcher at the National Institute of Mental Health and Richard Mills, the director of research at the National Autistic Society.
    This article appeared in BBC News, an editorial control has been made.
    The purpose of this article is to inform people about the progress of the treatment of autism. And in particular drug treatments, which are currently in animal testing and could be administered to humans in the future. This document is intended for a wide audience, as people who are interested in scientific subjects or families of people with autism.
    The information is presented as a scientific paper clear and complete. The author expresses his opinion in favor of studies and scientific data that explains in his article.
    Autism is characterized by several symptoms including social problems, language delay, and repetitive movements.
    Autism is treated with behavioral therapy and special education. There is no medicine to cure autism now.
    However, experiments in mice have recently been carried out by the US National Institutes of Health . This study showed positive results.
    Indeed, this drug causes an increase in social skills and repetitive behaviors least in animals..
    In some cases of autism, it has been proven that the communication between brain cells, at synapses, had a role in autism. Brain cells, especially synapses could be a therapeutic target in the manufacture of drugs against autism.
    The drug , GRN_529, interferes at synapses of brain cells.
    This drug has positive effects on mice with an improvement in social and less time grooming.
    Researchers believe a drug could be used in autism.
    But it will take time before these results are translated to human patients.
    In addition, the synapses allow all communications brain, so altering it by those drugs against autism can lead to significant adverse effects.

    4-Conclusion :
    This topic interested me a lot because I think it is a disease that we do not talk enough as it is not a disease like other diseases that can be cured. It is a disease that patients keep for life and this is a great handicap.
    I was surprised to know that there was absolutely no drug treatment. I was also surprised to know that there were many studies and research on the causes and treatment of disease and yet there are few results. But these results are encouraging for the hope of one day finding a drug for these patients.

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 15-03-2013 12:32



    Réponse: Correction/autisme de sherry48, postée le 15-03-2013 à 12:43:36 (S | E)
    Hello. Very interesting! There seems to have been some developments since I studied this in Early Childhood Education 13 years ago.

    1.Double check all of your third person singular present tense verbs; a few don't have a singular subject and some do, but have an incorrect verb ending. Two subjects to watch out for: people and information.
    2.The use of the article 'the' before a general noun.
    3. One case of an incorrect article before a word starting with a vowel.
    4. Take another look at the sentences below.

    This study has been shown that the causes of this disease could be genetic, immunological or in connection with the development of the brain.
    The information is presented as a scientific paper clear and complete.
    In fact, autism is heterogeneous, it translates differently: children can be reached severe developmental delays, but others are normal or improved IQ aves, some epilepsy, mental retardation or problems gastrointestinal.
    Investigators Demonstrated That families who use flea and tick powder on Their pets: slightly Increase the risk.
    It could be that we suffer deprivation microbial.
    The author expresses his opinion in favor of studies and scientific data that explains in his article.
    Indeed, this drug causes an increase in social skills and repetitive behaviors least in animals.
    This drug has positive effects on mice with an improvement in social and less time grooming
    In addition, the synapses allow all communications brain, so altering it by those drugs against autism can lead to significant adverse effects

    Sherry

    -------------------
    Modifié par sherry48 le 15-03-2013 12:49


    There are a few other minor errors, but if you repost with your corrections, I'm sure they can be pointed out.




    [POSTER UNE NOUVELLE REPONSE] [Suivre ce sujet]


    Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais










    Partager : Facebook / Twitter / ... 


    > INDISPENSABLES : TESTEZ VOTRE NIVEAU | GUIDE DE TRAVAIL | NOS MEILLEURES FICHES | Les fiches les plus populaires | Une leçon par email par semaine | Aide/Contact

    > COURS ET EXERCICES : Abréviations | Accords | Adjectifs | Adverbes | Alphabet | Animaux | Argent | Argot | Articles | Audio | Auxiliaires | Chanson | Communication | Comparatifs/Superlatifs | Composés | Conditionnel | Confusions | Conjonctions | Connecteurs | Contes | Contraires | Corps | Couleurs | Courrier | Cours | Dates | Dialogues | Dictées | Décrire | Démonstratifs | Ecole | Etre | Exclamations | Famille | Faux amis | Français Langue Etrangère / Langue Seconde |Films | Formation | Futur | Fêtes | Genre | Goûts | Grammaire | Grands débutants | Guide | Géographie | Heure | Homonymes | Impersonnel | Infinitif | Internet | Inversion | Jeux | Journaux | Lettre manquante | Littérature | Magasin | Maison | Majuscules | Maladies | Mots | Mouvement | Musique | Mélanges | Méthodologie | Métiers | Météo | Nature | Nombres | Noms | Nourriture | Négations | Opinion | Ordres | Orthographe | Participes | Particules | Passif | Passé | Pays | Pluriel | Politesse | Ponctuation | Possession | Poèmes | Pronominaux | Pronoms | Prononciation | Proverbes | Prépositions | Présent | Présenter | Quantité | Question | Relatives | Sports | Style direct | Subjonctif | Subordonnées | Synonymes | Temps | Tests de niveau | Tous/Tout | Traductions | Travail | Téléphone | Vidéo | Vie quotidienne | Villes | Voitures | Voyages | Vêtements

    > NOS AUTRES SITES GRATUITS : Cours mathématiques | Cours d'espagnol | Cours d'allemand | Cours de français | Cours de maths | Outils utiles | Bac d'anglais | Learn French | Learn English | Créez des exercices

    > INFORMATIONS : Copyright - En savoir plus, Aide, Contactez-nous [Conditions d'utilisation] [Conseils de sécurité] [Plan du site] Reproductions et traductions interdites sur tout support (voir conditions) | Contenu des sites déposé chaque semaine chez un huissier de justice | Mentions légales / Vie privée / Cookies.
    | Cours et exercices de français 100% gratuits, hors abonnement internet auprès d'un fournisseur d'accès.