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    Correction / Différences

    Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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    Correction / Différences
    Message de littlethings posté le 21-09-2014 à 18:04:52 (S | E | F)
    Bonjour tout le monde.
    J'aimerais que quelqu'un m'aide pour la correction de mon texte, s'il vous plaît.
    Merci pour vos réponses.

    If everyone looked alike, we would have nothing to learn from the other for example in the text Mr Mason teaches to the girl literature, if we looked alike, Mr Mason could not share his passion, his pleasure of teaching.
    Moreover, this is also the same in social relations: in friendships similarities are nice and sympathetic but it is in the differences that draws something on the person. It is also the case in love: differences attract, for example in the text, Bryan seems in love with this person, but what attracts him most is in her : there are the difference, because Emily isn't the same as the other girls.
    It is too the case in the international world, sometimes we can not be happy with what one has, but when you take the perspective on the world, the differences between children of France with an african child, we can learn how lucky we have.
    So the difference is a great asset because it is in the differences that we learn the most about yourself or others.

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 21-09-2014 18:13


    Réponse: Correction / Différences de here4u, postée le 21-09-2014 à 23:29:35 (S | E)
    Hello !

    If everyone looked alike, we would have nothing to learn from the otherS. For example in the text Mr Mason teaches (CONSTRUCTION)to the girl literature, if we looked alike, Mr Mason could not share his passion, his pleasure of teaching.(not clear ...)
    Moreover, this is also the same in social relations: in friendships similarities are nice and sympathetic but it is in the differences that draws something on the person. It is also the case in love: differences attract, for example in the text, Bryan seems in love with this (which one ?)person, but what attracts him most is in her : there are the difference, because Emily isn't the same as the other girls.
    It is too the case in the international world, sometimes we can not be happy with what one(we ... one ?) has, but when you take the perspective on the world (???), the differences between children of(from) France with an african child, we can learn how lucky we have.(construction à revoir !)
    So the difference is a great asset because it is in the differences that we learn the most about yourself(??? ourselves? ) or others.

    Ensemble bien difficile à comprendre pour le moment ... Faites vite une première relecture-correction et ça ira mieux ! Courage !



    Réponse: Correction / Différences de littlethings, postée le 22-09-2014 à 20:49:25 (S | E)
    Hello, merci de votre aide!

    If everyone looked alike, we would have nothing to learn from the others. For example in the text Mr Mason is teaching literature to the girl , if we looked alike, Mr Mason could not share his passion, his pleasure of literature.
    Moreover, this is also the same in social relationships: in friendships similarities are nice and funny but in the differences that we learn of the person. It is also the case in love: differences attract, for example in the text, Bryan seems in love with Emily, but what attracts him most is in her : they are the differences, because Emily isn't the same as the other girls.
    It is too the case in the international world, sometimes we are not happy with that one has, but when we take back the world, the differences between children from France with an african child, we can see the chance which we have.
    So differences are great assets because it is in the differences that we learn the most about ourselves or others.

    En espérant que mon texte est un peu plus clair,
    merci



    Réponse: Correction / Différences de here4u, postée le 23-09-2014 à 00:10:20 (S | E)
    Hello !
    Nettement mieux ... surtout au début !

    If everyone looked alike, we would have nothing to learn from (the) others. For example in the text Mr Mason is teaching literature to the girl , if we looked alike, Mr Mason could not share his passion, his pleasure of literature.(not very clear ...)
    Moreover, this is also the same in social relationships: in friendships, similarities are nice and funny butxxx (manque un verbe ...ou expression impersonnelle) in the differences that we learn of the person. It is also the case in love: differences attract, for example in the text, Bryan seems xxxx in love with Emily, but what attracts him most is in her : they are the differences,(maladroit) because Emily isn't the same as the other girls.
    It is too the case in the international world,; sometimes we are not happy with that one(???) has, but when we take back the world,(il manque un verbe explicatif ..;) the differences between children from France with(and ?) an african children, we can see the chance which(that) we have.
    So differences are great assets because it is in the differences that we learn the most about ourselves or others.

    Bon courage pour la suite !



    Réponse: Correction / Différences de littlethings, postée le 23-09-2014 à 19:36:39 (S | E)
    Hello! encore merci de votre aide! Voilà la seconde correction

    If everyone looked alike, we would have nothing to learn from others. For example in the text Mr Mason is teaching literature to the girl if we looked alike, Mr Mason could not share his passion, his pleasure of teaching literature.
    Moreover, this is also the same in social relationships: in friendships, similarities are nice and funny there are in the differences that we learn about the person. It is also the case in love: differences attract for example in the text, Bryan seems to fall in love with Emily, but what attracts him most in her : there are her differences because Emily isn't the same as the other girls.
    It is also the case in the international world,; sometimes we are not happy with that we have, but when we take back the world,we can see the differences between children from France and an children from Africa, we can see the chance(that) we have.
    So differences are great assets because it is in the differences that we learn the most about ourselves or others.



    Réponse: Correction / Différences de here4u, postée le 23-09-2014 à 22:13:11 (S | E)
    hello again !

    If everyone looked alike, we would have nothing to learn from others. For example in the text Mr Mason is teaching literature to the girl(I would stop my sentence here ... If I understand you,in the example MrM is a teacher and the girl a student ... if both were teachers, it ouldn't be funny !!!) if we looked alike, Mr Mason could not share his passion, his pleasure of teaching literature.(He could speak with a colleague, couldn't he ? )
    Moreover, this is also the same in social relationships: in friendships, similarities are nice and funny (there are in the) becuse of the ??? differences that we learn about the person. It is also the case in love: differences attract ; for example in the text, Bryan seems to fall in love with Emily, but what attracts him most in her (: there are)is the extent of her differences because Emily isn't the same as the other girls.
    It is also the case in the international world,; sometimes we are not happy with that we have, but when we take back(What do you mean ???) the world,we can see the differences between children from France and an children from Africa, we can see the chance(that) we have.(phrase avec 'to be lucky' ...)
    So differences are great assets because it is in the differences that we learn the most about ourselves or others.






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