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    Expression /smoking

    Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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    Expression /smoking
    Message de lindalyon posté le 14-10-2015 à 21:21:31 (S | E | F)
    Bonjour,
    J'aimerais avoir vos avis sur mon expression écrite d'anglais:

    Every year, active smoking is considered responsible of more than seventy-three thousand premature deaths in France. The cigarette is a powerful drug. Indeed, Tobacco is a drug more addictive than heroin or cocaine. The nicotine in the cigarette is the origin of this dependence.
    The nicotine is a strengthening drug. It means that smokers want it whatever secondary effects. Nicotine causes chemical and biological change in the brain.
    There are three types of tobacco dependence:
    -The physical dependence, essentially due to the presence of the nicotine in the tobacco. The shortage syndrome is caused by the steep decrease of the quantity of nicotine in the organism against the quantity to which the smoker is used to smoke.

    -The psychological dependence: it varies based on the people and takes most time than the physical dependence because of its complexity. It’s connected with strong emotions: stress, anger and concentration. In this case, the cigarette is considered like a veritable companion and some people think that they can’t live without cigarette.

    -The attitudinal dependence. This type of dependence is interlinked with social and convivial pressure. Certain places and certain people make you feel like smoking and you lighting up a cigarette by automatic response.

    To conclude, the cigarette is really harmful for our health whereas the percentage of smoker in France increase every year.


    Merci d'avance pour votre aide !!

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 14-10-2015 23:06


    Réponse: Expression /smoking de laure95, postée le 17-10-2015 à 18:06:21 (S | E)
    Bonjour,
    Voici ce que tu dois reprendre:
    - responsible of: pas la bonne préposition.
    -whatever secondary effects: ajouter ensuite le verbe TO BE conjugué.
    - chemical and biological change: à mettre au pluriel.
    - it varies based on the people: ?
    - most time: MOST est un superlatif, pas un comparatif.
    - you lighting up a cigarette: YOU pas obligatoire.
    - by automatic response.
    -smoker: à mettre au pluriel.



    Réponse: Expression /smoking de here4u, postée le 17-10-2015 à 20:31:25 (S | E)
    Hello !
    XXXXXXX = very clumsy.
    XXXx= wrong.

    Every year, active smoking is considered responsible of more than seventy-three thousand premature deaths in France. The cigarette is a powerful drug. Indeed, Tobacco is a drug more addictive (word order) than heroin or cocaine. The nicotine in the cigarette is the origin of this dependence.
    The nicotine is a strengthening drug. It means that smokers want it whatever secondary effects XXXXXX(this sentence sounds unfinished). Nicotine causes chemical and biological change in the brain.
    There are three types of tobacco dependence:
    -The physical dependence, essentially due to the presence of the nicotine in the tobacco. The shortage syndrome(not the usual expression...) is caused by the steep decrease of the quantity of nicotine in the organism against the quantity to which the smoker is used to smoke. (very clumsy sentence)

    -The psychological dependence: it varies based on the people and takes most time than the physical dependence because of its complexity. It’s connected with strong emotions: stress, anger and concentration. In this case, the cigarette is considered like a veritable companion and some people think that they can’t live without cigarette.

    -The attitudinal dependence. This type of dependence is interlinked with social and convivial pressure. Certain places and certain people make you feel like smoking and you lighting up a cigarette by automatic response.

    To conclude, the cigarette is really harmful for our health whereas the percentage of smoker in France increase every year.



    -------------------
    Modifié par here4u le 18-10-2015 10:04






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