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    Correction/ rédaction

    Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

    [POSTER UNE NOUVELLE REPONSE] [Suivre ce sujet]


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    Correction/ rédaction
    Message de netm posté le 18-10-2015 à 23:32:43 (S | E | F)
    Bonjour à tous et à toutes,
    j'aimerais faire corriger une rédaction s'il vous plaît
    Merci beaucoup !

    Le sujet : Have You ever hated one of your classemates? Why?
    The Monster about who I Will speak, adopt a human appearance for better mislead us.
    A side of angel for the teachers and a side of devil for the pupils who will have daring to have better points than she.
    Named demagogue by me from her real name .

    She throws her hypnosis, she looks at us with her soft eyes.
    When the paralysis does effect, she eat you inside, she invents a false reflection ( reflection ou image j'hésite ) .
    She told me that I'm an angel but that I'm a demon to R, she told me that R is a demon and she told him that he is an angel.
    She films(ou she records j'hesite ) me in the street, then she swears on her family that she does nothing, after have prove that she is lies by X and Y, the Monster plays a role of victim.

    Such a idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she don't wait a minute to take advantage of and for poison me again
    Since that day I told this to all my friends but they took me for an insane .
    Nobody believed me, she hid great her game and told that I'm lying.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bit their fingers, they regretted that they don't hear to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on viber she insults me.

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 19-10-2015 06:33


    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 19-10-2015 à 19:47:24 (S | E)
    Up



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de here4u, postée le 19-10-2015 à 20:57:07 (S | E)
    hello !

    blue = wrong
    blue= clumsy ...
    green = suggestion
    XXXX= missing elements


    Le sujet : Have You ever hated one of your classemates? Why?
    The Monster about who I Will speak, adopt a human appearance for better mislead us.construction)
    A side of angel for the teachers and a side of (the appearance of the ???)devil for the pupils who will have daring to have better points than she XXX.
    Named "XXX demagogue" by me from her real name (sorry! It doesn't make sense...) .

    She throws her hypnosis, she looks at us with her soft eyes.
    When the paralysis does effect, she eat you inside, she invents a false reflection ( reflection ou image j'hésite ; either is OK) . (Pourquoi ces changements de temps?)
    She told me that I'm an angel but that I'm a demon to R ???? , she told me that R is a demon and she told him that he is an angel.
    She films(ou she records j'hesite ) me in the street, then she swears on her family that she does nothing, after have prove that she is lies by X and Y, the Monster plays a the role of a victim.

    Being ???Such a idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she don't wait a minute to take advantage of IT and for poison me again
    Since that day I told this to all my friends but they took me for an insane=an adjective; you want a noun... .
    Nobody believed me, she hid great her game and told that I'm lying.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bit their fingers, they regretted that they don't hear (tense and vocabulary) to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on viber she insults me.





    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de lucile83, postée le 19-10-2015 à 21:51:06 (S | E)
    Hello,
    Viber should be written with a capital letter.



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 19-10-2015 à 22:37:00 (S | E)
    Le sujet : Have you ever hated one of your classemates? Why?

    I will speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance for better mislead.A appearance of angel for the teachers and a appearance of devil for the pupils who will have honor to have better points than she XXX.
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is .

    She throws her hypnosis, she looks at us with her soft eyes.
    When the paralysis is doing , she eats you inside, she invents a false either . (Pourquoi ces changements de temps?)
    She told me that I'm an angel but that I'm a demon to R ???? , she told me that R is a demon and she told him that he is an angel.
    She films(ou she records j'hesite ) me in the street, then she swears on her family that she does nothing, after prove that she is lies (by X and Y)Pourquoi c'est faux ?, the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she doesn't wait a minute to take advantage of IT and for poison me again
    Since that day I told this to all my friends but they took me for insane.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and told that I lie.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bit their fingers, they regretted that they don't listen to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de here4u, postée le 20-10-2015 à 22:17:39 (S | E)
    pourquoi répéter les mêmes fautes ? (lorsque j'écris temps + vocabulaire ..., il y a bien 2 éléments faux ...

    et quant aux 'corrections' 'a appearance' deux fois en première ligne ne vous gêne pas ? Au travail !



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 20-10-2015 à 23:34:53 (S | E)
    Je ne comprends pas très bien pourquoi les temps sont incorrects , pouvez-vous m'expliquer s'il vous plaît ?


    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 20-10-2015 23:38



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de here4u, postée le 21-10-2015 à 00:23:54 (S | E)
    hello !
    il faudrait décider si ce sujet est une description, une narration, ou l'énumération d'habitudes qui se répètent ... (les temps en dépendent)!

    Je laisse les temps (ce qui ne signifie pas qu'ils sont justes ...):

    I will speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance for better mislead(mislead est un verbe, il a, ici, besoin d'un complément etest mal construit, sans considération de temps!).A appearance of angel for the teachers and a appearance of XXX devil for the pupils who will have honor to have better points(better marks/grades?) than she XXX.
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is .

    She throws her hypnosis, she looks at us with her soft eyes.
    When the paralysis is doing (vocabulaire), she eats you inside, she invents a false either (ne veut rien dire... traducteur automatique?).
    She told(when?) me that I'm an angel but that I'm a demon to R la construction est fausse , she told me that R is a demon and she told him that he is an angel.
    She films(ou she records j'hesite ) me in the street, then she swears on her family that she does nothing, after prove =constrution fausse. that she is =auxiliaire; lies= nom pluriel! (by X and Y)Pourquoi c'est faux ?(parce que c'est, hélas, incompréhensible...), the Monster plays the role of a victim.OK!

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she doesn't wait a minute to take advantage of IT and for poison me again
    Since that day I told this to all my friends but they took me for insane.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and told that I lie.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bit their fingers, they regretted that they don't listen to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.
    courage !



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 21-10-2015 à 21:37:40 (S | E)
    I will speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceit everyone.An angel's appearance for the teachers and a devil's appearance for the pupils who will have honor to get better points than she XXX.
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is .

    She throws her hypnosis, she looks at us with her soft eyes.
    When she uses her paralysis, she eats you inside, she invents a false herself.
    She told me that I'm an angel but I'm a demon to R(prénom), she told me that R is a demon and she told him that he is an angel.
    She records me in the street, then she swears that she does nothing , after prove that she is lied by a+b , the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait a minute to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I told this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and told that I lie.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bit their fingers, they regretted that they didn't listen to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 22-10-2015 à 15:49:44 (S | E)
    Up



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de gerondif, postée le 22-10-2015 à 16:43:58 (S | E)
    Bonjour,
    erreurs en bleu, corrections en vert
    I will(je mettrais plutôt le conditionnel de like) speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceit(est un nom) everyone.An angel's appearance for (ne se dit guère, il vaudrait mieux dire: elle ressemble à (look like) un ange pour les profs mais EST (car ça n'est pas qu'une apparance) un démon pour ses camarades ) the teachers and a devil's appearance for the pupils who will(il faudrait un conditionnel) have honor to(ne veut pas dire grand chose) get better points (on n'est pas à l'Eurovision, les notes de devoirs, ça se dit "mark")than she XXX.
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is .

    She throws her hypnosis(ne se dit guère), she looks at(il faudrait un verbe plus fort) us with her soft eyes.
    When she uses her paralysis,(ne se dit guère) she eats you inside, she invents a false herself.(ne se dit guère)
    She told me that I'm(prétérit) an angel but told R I'm(prétérit) a demon , she told me that R is(prétérit) a demon and she told him that he is(prétérit) an angel.
    She records (enregistrer??) me in the street, then she swears that she does nothing(n'a pas de sens ici en anglais, dites "qu'elle est innocente, qu'elle n'a rien fait de mal) , after prove(construction) that she is lied by("elle est mentie par" n'a pas de sens) a+b , the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait a minute(ne se dit guère) to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I told(present perfect) this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and told(convient si on dit à qui elle parle, sinon, déclarer que, c'est le verbe say) that I lie(plu perfect, que j'avais menti).
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bit their fingers(ne se dit pas, ou alors, ils avaient faim), they regretted that they didn't listen(construction, il faut une forme en ing négative) to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.




    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 23-10-2015 à 05:37:39 (S | E)
    I would like to speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceit(je veux dire pour mieux tromper tout le monde ) everyone. She looks like an angel's appearance for the teachers but is a devil for the pupils who would like to get better marks than she XXX.(Pourquoi avoir mis des croix ? )
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is .

    She casts her hypnosis, she watches us with her soft eyes,
    When she paralyzes us, she eats you inside, she invents an false appearance.
    She told me that I was an angel but told R I was a demon , she told me that R was a demon and she told him that he was an angel.
    She films me in the street, then she swears that she is innocent , after have proved that she has lied by a+b , the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I have told this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and said that I lay.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bit their fingers(Je ne peux pas dire ils avaient faim car je veux dire qu'ils s'en sont mordu les doigts :/ ) , they regretted that they aren't listing to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.

    Merci beaucoup



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de gerondif, postée le 23-10-2015 à 10:41:51 (S | E)
    Bonjour,
    I would like to speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceit( (mettez le VERBE) everyone. She looks like an angel's appearance for the teachers but is a devil for the pupils who would like to get better marks than she XXX.(Pourquoi avoir mis des croix ? ah, c'est un truc de Here4U pour faire joli ,à moins qu'il ne manque un auxiliaire de reprise du présent )
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is .

    She casts her hypnosis,(ne se dit pas) she watches us with her soft eyes,
    When she paralyzes us, she eats you inside, she invents an false appearance.
    She told me that I was an angel but told R I was a demon , she told me that R was a demon and she told him that he was an angel.
    She films me in the street, then she swears that she is innocent , after have proved that she has lied by a+b (ne se dit pas + mal construit: français traduit mot-à-mot "prouver par a+b que..."), the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I have told this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and said that I lay.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bit their fingers , they regretted that they aren't listing(construction + verbe estropié) to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.




    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de lemagemasque, postée le 23-10-2015 à 11:53:28 (S | E)
    Hello!

    Je voudrais juste dire que "than she" est tout aussi correct que "than she is" (par exemple) ou "than her".
    En fait, ces 3 choix dépendent de la nature de "than" : conjonction ou préposition.
    "Than" préposition, choix le plus courant mais peut-être considéré comme familier, serait donc "than her".
    "Than conjonction serait donc "than she" ("is" sous-entendu) ou "than she is". "Than she" peut paraitre sans doute un peu pompeux. "Than she is" est donc peut-être le meilleur choix entre "than she" et "than her", le choix le moins risqué.

    See you!



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de gerondif, postée le 23-10-2015 à 14:38:27 (S | E)
    Hello,
    pour moi, "than she" est une hérésie parce que c'est un nominatif en position de complément.
    She is a devil for the pupils who would like to get better marks than she does est de l'anglais très correct, presque trop correct dans ce texte de règlement de comptes.
    She is a devil for the pupils who would like to get better marks than her serait de l'anglais standard.
    On apprend:
    I am taller than her //I am taller than she is, la deuxième solution étant moins courante et plus relevée.
    Si on sous-entend le verbe, I am taller than she, pour moi ça sonne très faux à mes oreilles.
    Pour moi, le choix lambda serait than her.





    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de lemagemasque, postée le 23-10-2015 à 16:24:08 (S | E)
    Hello gerondif!

    Le débat date d'il y a longtemps déjà.
    Certains ont des avis très tranchés. Oxford, que lucile aime, dit très clairement que "than her" est faux : Lien internet
    (voir "Usage"). C'est peut-être un peu poussé mais bon.
    Il y a bien un problème de nominatif (subjective) et accusatif (≈ objective) mais en fait, tout se résume à un problème de nature.
    Conjonction = subjective
    Préposition = objective

    Pour la plupart, "than" est une préposition et donc, on devrait avoir quelque chose comme "than her". Cependant, "than" peut aussi être considéré comme une conjonction.
    J'ai déjà été corrigé pour "than she" d'ailleurs, par des natives

    On a aussi un débat adjacent pour "It's me/It's I".

    See you! Je suis content d'avoir une réaction !



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de gerondif, postée le 23-10-2015 à 16:33:39 (S | E)
    A Manchester en 73 on disait en "native language": It was me did it !! Tara, Luv!(Goodbye, dear) Ta!(Thanks)
    Votre Than she ou than I ne valait pas 10 bob !!



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de lemagemasque, postée le 23-10-2015 à 16:40:35 (S | E)
    Ay up me duck!

    Ta est encore courant ainsi que la supression du relatif
    Certains emploient d'ailleurs "what" à la place de that.
    Tah-tah (goodbye) n'est plus trop utilisé...
    Le subjonctif est encore employé après "if" dans certaines régions d'Angleterre.
    C'est très intéressant ces discussions sur les régionalismes.




    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 23-10-2015 à 19:39:00 (S | E)
    I would like to speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceive everyone. She looks like an angel's appearance for the teachers but is a devil for the pupils who would like to get better marks than she is.
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is .

    She's pulling ,(ne se dit pas) she watches us with her soft eyes,
    When she paralyzes us, she eats you inside, she invents an false appearance.
    She told me that I was an angel but told R I was a demon , she told me that R was a demon and she told him that he was an angel.
    She films me in the street, then she swears that she is innocent , after proving that she has lied, the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I have told this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and said that I lay.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) regret their decision, they regretted that they aren't listing(Je ne comprend pas vous voulez donc que j'utilise le verbe estropié ? ) to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.

    Merci beaucoup de vos nombreuses corrections en tout cas



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de lucile83, postée le 23-10-2015 à 21:35:32 (S | E)
    Hello
    J'aime bien Oxford dictionary mais j'aime bien Collins aussi qui m'a suivi pendant toutes mes années Fac (en 2 volumes bien sûr, 1 fr-anglais et le 2e anglais -fr)...et pour than me /than I, on doit distinguer de quoi on parle, voir ici:
    Lien internet
    ...sous &3
    USAGE In formal English, than is usually regarded as a conjunction governing an unexpressed verb: he does it far better than I ( do). The case of any pronoun therefore depends on whether it is the subject or object of the unexpressed verb: she likes him more than I ( like him); she likes him more than ( she likes) me. However in ordinary speech and writing than is usually treated as a preposition and is followed by the object form of a pronoun: my brother is younger than me.

    Je signale que netm a posté sa correction juste avant mon message.



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de here4u, postée le 23-10-2015 à 22:38:25 (S | E)
    hello lemage
    Laisse donc tes régionalismes au 'fond de ta mémoire' pour le Bac ...netm n'a pas besoin de complications inutiles



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de gerondif, postée le 23-10-2015 à 22:57:51 (S | E)
    Bonsoir.
    Vous avez bien égayé ma soirée avec votre:

    "Je ne comprends pas, vous voulez donc que j'utilise le verbe estropié ?"
    Dites-voir, vous connaissez beaucoup d'infinitifs en "é"? Il me semble qu'on apprend assez vite les terminaisons des verbes en er, ir, re.
    Non, ce que je voulais dire, c'est que vous avez estropié le verbe listen qui donnera listening et non pas listing, qui viendrait du verbe to list.

    I would like to speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceive everyone. She looks like an angel's appearance (il va falloir corriger cette erreur combien de fois ? on ressemble à un ange, on ne ressemble pas à l'apparence d'un ange)for the teachers but is a devil for the pupils who would like to get better marks than she is.(Ca ne va pas!! on dirait: Other pupils get better marks than she does, on ne peut pas mettre is, sinon ça donne : elle est un démon pour les élèves qui aimeraient obtenir de meilleures notes qu'elle ne l'est (un démon) )
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is .

    She's pulling ,(elle tire sur quoi au juste ?) she watches us with her soft eyes,
    When she paralyzes us, she eats you inside, she invents an false appearance.
    She told me that I was an angel but told R I was a demon , she told me that R was a demon and she told him that he was an angel.
    She films me in the street, then she swears that she is innocent even when we prove that she has lied, after proving that she has lied, the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I have told this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and said that I lay.(C'est gentil de vouloir rendre le verbe to lie, I lied, mentir , irrégulier, hélas, il s'agit alors du verbe to lie, I lay, lain, qui signifie être allongé, ou autrefois "gésir" comme sur les pierres tombales "ci-gît = ici repose...)
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) regretted their decision, they regretted that they aren't listing to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.

    Un indice: I regret not waiting for her:je regrette de ne pas l'avoir attendue.




    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 24-10-2015 à 14:09:54 (S | E)
    I would like to speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceive everyone. She looks like an angel (il va falloir corriger cette erreur combien de fois ? on ressemble à un ange, on ne ressemble pas à l'apparence d'un ange)for the teachers but is a devil for the students who would like to get better marks than she does.
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is
    She hypnotized us, she watches us with her soft eyes,
    When she paralyzes us, she eats you inside, she invents a false appearance.
    She told me that I was an angel but told R I was a demon , she told me that R was a demon and she told him that he was an angel.
    She films me in the street, then she swears that she is innocent even when we prove that she has lied, after proving that she has lied, the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I have told this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and said that I lied.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) regretted their decision, they regretted that they aren't listening to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.

    J'ai corrigé ça pour le moment , il reste encore 2 fautes ( si ma correction est juste ) je vais réfléchir .
    Merci !



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de gerondif, postée le 24-10-2015 à 16:08:38 (S | E)
    Bonjour,

    I would like to speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceive everyone. She looks like an angel for the teachers but is a devil for the students who would like to get better marks than she does.
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is
    She hypnotized(pourquoi un prétérit) us, she watches us with her soft eyes,
    When she paralyzes us, she eats you inside, she invents a false appearance.
    She told me that I was an angel but told R I was a demon , she told me that R was a demon and she told him that he was an angel.
    She films me in the street, then she swears that she is innocent even when we prove that she has lied, after proving that she has lied(pourquoi laissez-vous cette phrase ?), the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I have told this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and said that I lied.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) regretted their decision, they regretted that they aren't listening to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.

    Comparez:
    Un indice: I regret not waiting for her:je regrette de ne pas l'avoir attendue.
    they regretted that they aren't listening to me



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 24-10-2015 à 17:54:41 (S | E)
    I would like to speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceive everyone. She looks like an angel for the teachers but is a devil for the students who would like to get better marks than she does.
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is
    She hypnotizes us, she watches us with her soft eyes,
    When she paralyzes us, she eats you inside, she invents a false appearance.
    She told me that I was an angel but told R I was a demon , she told me that R was a demon and she told him that he was an angel.
    She films me in the street, then she swears that she is innocent even when we prove that she has lied,, the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I have told this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and said that I lied.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) regretted their decision, they regretted not listening to me, she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.

    Merci encore



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de gerondif, postée le 24-10-2015 à 19:04:59 (S | E)
    Hello,
    On y arrive!

    one week later R and I(prénom) regretted their decision, they regretted not listening to me, correct mais pour éviter la répétition, on pourrait dire: They wished they had listened to me.
    bitterly signifie amèrement: ça pourrait aller devant le premier regretted pour aller dans le sens de "se mordre les doigts".



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 24-10-2015 à 19:47:56 (S | E)
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bitterly regretted their decision,They wished they had listened to me., she used them, this girl who looks so nice is very dangerous.
    C'est correct ?



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de gerondif, postée le 24-10-2015 à 19:56:56 (S | E)
    Oui.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bitterly regretted their decision,They wished they had listened to me. She used them. This girl, who looks so nice, is very dangerous.



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 24-10-2015 à 21:02:51 (S | E)
    I would like to speak about a Monster who adopted a human appearance to deceive everyone. She looks like an angel for the teachers but is a devil for the students who would like to get better marks than she does.
    Named " demagogue" by me .Her real name is
    She hypnotizes us, she watches us with her soft eyes,
    When she paralyzes us, she eats you inside, she invents a false appearance.
    She told me that I was an angel but told R I was a demon , she told me that R was a demon and she told him that he was an angel.
    She films me in the street, then she swears that she is innocent even when we prove that she has lied,, the Monster plays the role of a victim.

    Being such an idiot, I forgave her, I gave her a second chance, she didn't wait to take advantage of IT and poison me again
    Since that day I have told this to all my friends but they see me as an insane person.
    Nobody believed me, she hid her game and said that I lied.
    Of course one week later R and I(prénom) bitterly regretted their decision.They wished they had listened to me. She used them. This girl, who looks so nice, is very dangerous.
    In class she is very soft but on Viber she insults me.

    Voici donc mon texte
    Merci à tous !



    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de gerondif, postée le 25-10-2015 à 09:02:55 (S | E)
    Hello,
    R and I(prénom) bitterly regretted their decision. si I signifie je, alors cela donne:
    Roger et moi avons amèrement regretté notre décision.
    Comme avant vous mettiez:
    She told me that I was an angel but told R I was a demon , qui sont ces R ET I en fin de texte ?




    Réponse: Correction/ rédaction de netm, postée le 25-10-2015 à 11:43:37 (S | E)
    R , et I signifie sont des initiales de prénoms , nommons-les Robert et Imane .
    Lundi je rends mon texte à ma prof , quand je vais écrire je ne vais pas mettre I mais Imane par exemple , donc il n'y a aucune faute ?


    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 25-10-2015 11:54




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