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    Correction/Place et formes pouvoir

    Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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    Correction/Place et formes pouvoir
    Message de mimilele posté le 10-03-2016 à 22:04:25 (S | E | F)
    Bonjour,
    J'aurais besoin de votre aide pour la correction d'un texte s'il vous plait!
    Merci d'avance pour vos réponses! ;)

    To begin, I'm going to define this notion « Place and forms of power ». Power is the ability to control others, events, or resources and places can also be a country or a state, which is powerful enough to influence events throughout the world.
    To illustrate this notion I've chosen the country of the United States which has a story marked by unequal rights against blacks. Thus I will try to answer this question : How Whites imposed to the Afro-American a forms of power during the segregation ? First I will speak about the slavery which is an important point to understand the origin of segregation and to finish I will speak about the unfairness suffered by the Afro-American during this period.

    First, let's concentrate on the fact that everything started with slavery. Indeed, this activity began with the arrival of the first settlers in the American colonies, from the 17th century more specifically in the southern states where slaves were needed to work on plantations. Thus already at that time Whites gave themselves the right to exercise a form of power over the Blacks people. In 1776, the American colonies declared independence from the United Kingdom but in this declaration nothing aimed at solving the problem of slavery. During the 1861 presidential election Lincoln's platform proposed to stop the evolution of slavery, indeed, newly integrated states would refuse slavery. His election led a civil war. Finally, in 1865 slavery was abolished by the 13th Amendment. However the power of Whites against Blacks didn't weaken. One year later the South instored the Jim Craw laws to recreate a polticial system in which citizenship was denied to freed men. It was the birth of the segregation which aimed at separating people on the basis of the colour of their skin in their everyday life. Afro-American which is the ethnic group of citizens whose ancestors were brought from Africa and from the Caribeans as slaves began a long fight. Lynching became a real tradition as Billie Holiday denounced in her song « Strange Fruit ». Also, violent groups terrorized black people like the KKK which is a white supremacy organisation made of extremist protestants founded in 1865 during the civil war. And the US Suprem Court states in favor of segregation in 1896 with the doctrine « separate but equal », so it is, indisputably, the proof that Whites people apply a superiority and a power on the Afro-American which was supported by the States.

    Now I will put forward the differents ways which characterised the abusive power of the White against the Black people. First they were harrazed as we can see thanks to Cynthia Bound, an author who lived in Texas and who shared us these horrors in her book « Ruby ». We can also take the example of the famous Black leader Malcom X whose the father was murdered by a white supremacist. In spite of this terror nobody seemed able a that time to change this situation. Discrimation were also in the US army where Balck didn't have the same right as the other soldiers. But this fact changed with to the president Trueman who issued orders requiring no segregation in the army. Furthermore Black people didn't have the right to go in White school since they were separated from White people in their everyday life. Even if they were forced to walk many kilometers. This situation changed however officialy in 1954 when Brown decision by the Suprem Court desegregation in school. But this law was not repected immediatly as we can see with the painting of Norman Rockwell « The problem we all live with. ». In the southern states segregation was also in the public transport which were divided in two parts, one for the White and an other for the Black. And when they were no more place for White people in their areas, Balck people should give up their seat to the other passenger. And each time this action was a real humiliation for Balck people who were obligated to suffer a pressure from other people who didn't have any reason to be superior. Sometimes black people refused that, like Rosa Park in December 1955 in Montgomery in Alabama. Indeed, this secretary of the local NAACP which is an acronym for National Association for the Advancment of Colored people refused one day to give up her seat and were also sent to jail. But it's important to know that this seamstess made sparked off a protest to obtain new rights as we recall the Neville Brothers in their song « Sister Rosa », indeed, after this fact a busboycott was led by a famous pastor ; Martin Luther King. And finally lead to the end of segregation in bus. But all of these progress were difficult and white puted in place an unwarranted superiority during many and many years. For example the right to vote and the official law which stopped the segregation were voted only in 1964.

    To put it in a nutschell we can say that during several century from slavery to finally the segragation, the whites practised unfairly and without acceptable reason power on the Black people. This fact which was first supported by the government was stopped officialy in 1964. But it's important to know that always today some White people seem to believe superior as Black people. For example the KKK always exist and today count many members. They organis yet today demonstration for the supremacy of White people. And sadly events that we can believe in racial connotation still occur like the murderer of the young A-A Michael Brown in Ferguson in 2014 by a policeman. But fortunatly many people advocate equality even in this country in which White occured a power during several century as we can see with the election of a Black president in 2009 ; Barack Obama.


    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 10-03-2016 22:51



    Réponse: Correction/Place et formes pouvoir de laure95, postée le 11-03-2016 à 19:14:05 (S | E)
    Bonsoir,
    - How Whites imposed to the Afro-American a forms of power during the segregation ?: tu fais une question directe ou indirecte? + A + SINGULIER.

    -this activity began with the arrival of the first settlers in the American colonies: THIS ne s'emploie pas au passé.
    - the Blacks people: pas de "s" à un adjectif.
    - in this declaration
    - His election led (préposition) civil war.
    - However the power of (article)Whites against (article)Blacks didn't weaken.
    - polticial
    - so it is, indisputably, the proof that Whites people apply (temps)a superiority and a power

    - the differents (adjectif invariable)ways which characterised the abusive power of the White against the Black people.
    - who shared (préposition) us these (pas au passé) horrors in her book « Ruby ».
    - whose the (pas d'article)father was murdered by a white supremacist.
    - In spite of this terror, this situation.
    - Discrimation were(conjugaison) also in the US army
    - But this fact
    - changed with to (TO?) the (pas de the) president Trueman
    -to go in (pas la bonne préposition) White school (pluriel)
    - This situation changed
    - Brown decision: cas possessif=
    - by the Suprem Court desegregation in school.
    - But this law
    - And when they were no more place: THERE WERE + PLURIEL.
    - Balck people should (pas possible au passé) give up their seat (pluriel)to the other passenger (pluriel).
    - this action
    - Balck people
    - this secretary
    - this fact
    - And finally lead: temps.
    - these progress
    - white puted in place: verbe irrégulier.

    - several century (pluriel) from slavery (pas la bonne préposition) to finally the segragation,
    - without (article) acceptable reason power on the Black people.
    - This fact
    - always (pas le bon mot pour dire toujours dans ce cas)today some White people seem to believe superior as (pas la bonne préposition)Black people.
    - They organis
    - several century




    Réponse: Correction/Place et formes pouvoir de mimilele, postée le 14-03-2016 à 21:27:34 (S | E)
    Merci beaucoup pour votre aide mon texte est mieux ainsi!!

    To begin, I'm going to define this notion « Place and forms of power ». Power is the ability to control others, events, or resources and places can also be a country or a state, which is powerful enough to influence events throughout the world.
    To illustrate this notion I've chosen the country of the United States which has a story marked by unequal rights against blacks. Thus I will try to answer this question : How imposed Whites to the Afro-American a form of power during the segregation ? First I will speak about the slavery which is an important point to understand the origin of segregation and to finish I will speak about the unfairness suffered by the Afro-American during this period.

    First, let's concentrate on the fact that everything started with slavery. Indeed, this activity began with the arrival of the first settlers in the American colonies, from the 17th century more specifically in the southern states where slaves were needed to work on plantations. Thus already at that time Whites gave themselves the right to exercise a form of power over the Black people. In 1776, the American colonies declared independence from the United Kingdom but in this declaration nothing aimed at solving the problem of slavery. During the 1861 presidential election Lincoln's platform proposed to stop the evolution of slavery, indeed, newly integrated states would refuse slavery. His election led civil war. Finally, in 1865 slavery was abolished by the 13th Amendment. However the power of the Whites against the Black people didn't weaken. One year later the South instored the Jim Craw laws to recreate a politicial system in which citizenship was denied to freed men. It was the birth of the segregation which aimed at separating people on the basis of the colour of their skin in their everyday life. Afro-American which is the ethnic group of citizens whose ancestors were brought from Africa and from the Caribeans as slaves began a long fight. Lynching became a real tradition as Billie Holiday denounced in her song « Strange Fruit ». Also, violent groups terrorized black people like the KKK which is a white supremacy organisation made of extremist protestants founded in 1865 during the civil war. And the US Suprem Court states in favor of segregation in 1896 with the doctrine « separate but equal », so it is, indisputably, the proof that Whites people applied a superiority and a power on the Afro-American which was supported by the States.

    Now I will put forward the different ways which characterised the abusive power of the White against the Black people. First they were harrazed as we can see thanks to Cynthia Bound, an author who lived in Texas and who shared to us this horrors in her book « Ruby ». We can also take the example of the famous Black leader Malcom X whose father was murdered by a white supremacist. In spite of this terror nobody seemed able a that time to change this situation. Discrimation was also in the US army where Balck didn't have the same right as the other soldiers. But this fact changed with president Trueman who issued orders requiring no segregation in the army. Furthermore Black people didn't have the right to go to White schools since they were separated from White people in their everyday life. Even if they were forced to walk many kilometers. This situation changed however officialy in 1954 when Brown decision's by the Suprem Court desegregation in school. But this law was not repected immediatly as we can see with the painting of Norman Rockwell « The problem we all live with. ». In the southern states segregation was also in the public transport which were divided in two parts, one for the White and an other for the Black. And when they were no more places for White people in their areas, Balck people must give up their seats to the other passengers. And each time this action was a real humiliation for Black people who were obligated to suffer a pressure from other people who didn't have any reason to be superior. Sometimes black people refused that, like Rosa Park in December 1955 in Montgomery in Alabama. Indeed, this secretary of the local NAACP which is an acronym for National Association for the Advancment of Colored people refused one day to give up her seat and were also sent to jail. But it's important to know that this seamstess made sparked off a protest to obtain new rights as we recall the Neville Brothers in their song « Sister Rosa », indeed, after this fact a busboycott was led by a famous pastor ; Martin Luther King. And finally led to the end of segregation in bus. But all of this progress were difficult and white put in place an unwarranted superiority during many and many years. For example the right to vote and the official law which stopped the segregation were voted only in 1964.



    Réponse: Correction/Place et formes pouvoir de mimilele, postée le 14-03-2016 à 21:27:54 (S | E)
    To put it in a nutschell we can say that during several centuries after the slavery to finally the segragation, the whites practised unfairly and without an acceptable reason power on the Black people. This fact which was first supported by the government was stopped officialy in 1964. But it's important to know that still today some White people seem to believe superior than Black people. For example the KKK always exist and today count many members. They organis yet today demonstration for the supremacy of White people. And sadly events that we can believe in racial connotation still occur like the murderer of the young A-A Michael Brown in Ferguson in 2014 by a policeman. But fortunatly many people advocate equality even in this country in which White occured a power during several centuries as we can see with the election of a Black president in 2009 ; Barack Obama.



    Réponse: Correction/Place et formes pouvoir de laure95, postée le 15-03-2016 à 14:54:52 (S | E)
    Bonjour,
    THIS ne s'emploie pas au passé. Il faut utiliser THAT!

    - How imposed Whites to the Afro-American a form of power during the segregation ?: construction d'une question : MOT INTERROGATIF + AUXILIAIRE + SUJET + VERBE NON CONJUGUE.
    - First I will speak about the slavery which is an important point to understand the origin of segregation and to finish (à remplacer par THEN ou SECOND)I will speak about the unfairness suffered by the Afro-American during this period.

    - Indeed, this (THAT)activity began with the arrival of the first settlers in the American colonies,
    - in this declaration
    - His election led (il manque une préposition +un article)civil war.
    - And the US Suprem Court states (passé)in favor of segregation in 1896

    - who shared to (pas la bonne préposition) us this horrors (THIS + SINGULIER) in her book « Ruby ».
    - In spite of this (that)terror nobody seemed (TO BE)able a (pas le bon mot) that time to change this (that)situation.
    - Discrimation was also in the US army where Balck didn't have the same right (pluriel)
    - But this fact changed
    - This situation changed
    - however officialy in 1954 when Brown decision's by the Suprem (orthographe)Court desegregation in school: où est le verbe?
    - But this (that)law was not repected
    - And when they were no more places for White people in their areas: THEY WERE ne veut pas dire: "il y avait".
    - Balck: faute de frappe?
    - people must (chercher son équivalent au passé) give up their seats to the other passengers.
    - And each time this (that) action was a real humiliation for Black people who were obligated (obliged)to suffer a pressure
    - Indeed, this (that) secretary of the local NAACP
    - were (conjugaison)also sent to jail.
    - But it's important to know that this (that)seamstess made sparked off a protest to obtain new rights
    - indeed, after this (that)fact a busboycott was led by a famous pastor ;
    - But all of this (those) progress were difficult
    - during (pas le bon mot)many and many years.

    -This (that) fact which was first supported by the government
    - to believe superior than (pas le bon mot)Black people.
    - They organis (orthographe)yet today demonstration (pluriel) for the supremacy of White people.
    -the murderer (murderer = meurtrier)of the young A-A Michael Brown in Ferguson in 2014 by a policeman.





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