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Message de tamtam78 posté le 08-11-2017 à 01:38:23 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous !
Pouvez-vous s'il vous plait corriger ma lettre de motivation qui est en anglais?
Merci d'avance !
Dear Mr. James,
I am writing to apply for the I.T administrator position advertised in the xxx. In fact, the opportunity presented in this listing is very interesting, and I believe that my strong technical experience and education will make me a very competitive candidate for this position.
With a engineering degree in Computer Programming, i gained a wealth of knowledge in network administrator and had experiences with a server virtualization like Vmware or Docker. I maintained, installed and fixed both software and hardware, performed extensive system updates and improved the IT networks of two separate organizations. Furthermore, my background, qualification and work experience in networking, systems engineering, and security appear to be well suited to your company's specific requirements.
Due to my experience in working with Windows, Apple and Linux, i had to face up difficulties and thanks to this i learned to be rigorous, autonomous and confident in my work. Mostly, I am very enthusiastic about the possibility of joining your company, i believe i can apply the skills obtained from my previous employment to this position and would welcome the opportunity to contribute to your continued success.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I have enclosed a copy of my CV and I hope you will find my skills and qualifications suitable for your further consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours sincerely,
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 08-11-2017 07:59
Message de tamtam78 posté le 08-11-2017 à 01:38:23 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous !
Pouvez-vous s'il vous plait corriger ma lettre de motivation qui est en anglais?
Merci d'avance !
Dear Mr. James,
I am writing to apply for the I.T administrator position advertised in the xxx. In fact, the opportunity presented in this listing is very interesting, and I believe that my strong technical experience and education will make me a very competitive candidate for this position.
With a engineering degree in Computer Programming, i gained a wealth of knowledge in network administrator and had experiences with a server virtualization like Vmware or Docker. I maintained, installed and fixed both software and hardware, performed extensive system updates and improved the IT networks of two separate organizations. Furthermore, my background, qualification and work experience in networking, systems engineering, and security appear to be well suited to your company's specific requirements.
Due to my experience in working with Windows, Apple and Linux, i had to face up difficulties and thanks to this i learned to be rigorous, autonomous and confident in my work. Mostly, I am very enthusiastic about the possibility of joining your company, i believe i can apply the skills obtained from my previous employment to this position and would welcome the opportunity to contribute to your continued success.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I have enclosed a copy of my CV and I hope you will find my skills and qualifications suitable for your further consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours sincerely,
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 08-11-2017 07:59
Réponse : Cover letter/aide de badge642, postée le 11-11-2017 à 07:07:23 (S | E)
bleu = corrections
vert = suggestions
Dear Mr. James,
I am writing to apply for the I.T. administrator position advertised in the xxx. In fact,Je disais qu'il n'est pas nécessaire de dire 'in fact' the opportunity presented in this listing is very interesting'the opportunity presented in this listing interests me greatly' est plus personnel, and I believe that my strong technical experience and education will make me a very competitive candidate for this position.
With a engineering degree in Computer Programming, i'I' en majuscule... have gained a wealth of knowledge in network administration and have experience with server virtualization softwarelike Vmware or Docker. I have maintained, installed and fixed both software and hardware, performed extensive system updates and improved the IT networks of two separate organizations. Furthermore, my background, qualifications and work experience in networking, systems engineering, and security appear to be well suited to your company's specific requirements.
Due to my experience in working with Windows, Apple and Linux, I have had to confront difficulties, and thanks to this I learned to be rigorous, autonomous and confident in my work. Most importantly ('mostly' implique que tu n'es pas vraiment enthousiaste!, I am very enthusiastic about the possibility of joining your company,and I believe I can apply the skills obtained from my previous employment to this position and would welcome the opportunity to contribute to your continued success.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I have enclosed a copy of my CV and I hope you will find my skills and qualifications suitable for your further consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours sincerely,
J'espère que ça t'aide!
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