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Message de manon03 posté le 10-01-2014 à 01:05:24 (S | E | F)
Bonsoir à tous,
j'ai dû écrire un texte racontant l'histoire d'un homme qui a volé de l'argent à un autre homme et je voulais savoir s'il y avait des fautes.
Merci pour votre aide.
It was the night and I came back home. I was afraid because I had a feeling that a person followed me so; I decided to walk more quickly. But I knew what happened because I did a real bad think.
Last Sunday, I arrived in Gatwick; in London I was so exciting because I didn’t see my wife during two months. But When I entered in the taxi that I take I saw a suitcase in which there was a lot of money and the photograph of a black man. I didn’t know why but I take it.
I think it was the man who was one the photograph who searched me to found his money. And I was right because when I entered in my apartment he was on my sofa.
He asked me “where is my money?”
I answered “the money is in the fridge.”
He went in the kitchen, I didn’t know why but he went in the good room, he counted the notes and said “never do it again, because if you do it again I will kill you”.
I answered “I will”
He went. I pasted one the most horrible night of my life.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 10-01-2014 07:58
Message de manon03 posté le 10-01-2014 à 01:05:24 (S | E | F)
Bonsoir à tous,
j'ai dû écrire un texte racontant l'histoire d'un homme qui a volé de l'argent à un autre homme et je voulais savoir s'il y avait des fautes.
Merci pour votre aide.
It was the night and I came back home. I was afraid because I had a feeling that a person followed me so; I decided to walk more quickly. But I knew what happened because I did a real bad think.
Last Sunday, I arrived in Gatwick; in London I was so exciting because I didn’t see my wife during two months. But When I entered in the taxi that I take I saw a suitcase in which there was a lot of money and the photograph of a black man. I didn’t know why but I take it.
I think it was the man who was one the photograph who searched me to found his money. And I was right because when I entered in my apartment he was on my sofa.
He asked me “where is my money?”
I answered “the money is in the fridge.”
He went in the kitchen, I didn’t know why but he went in the good room, he counted the notes and said “never do it again, because if you do it again I will kill you”.
I answered “I will”
He went. I pasted one the most horrible night of my life.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 10-01-2014 07:58
Réponse: Correction/ traduction de bluduck2, postée le 10-01-2014 à 09:25:25 (S | E)
Hello manon 3,
I suggest revising the irregular verbs:to take ,to find ,to spend and the tenses of the past : simple past and plu perfect (line 2 ,line3).
Check also the past continuous (line 1 )on "était en train" de vous suivre.
Other remarks:-- to enter (line 3 and line 5) is a transitive verb .
--(line 3)the trip was exciting, but you were excited /,tired,/ thrilled.
--Do not translate "c'était l'homme qui...",turn the sentence differently.
--Future, negative form= I won't(line 10)
--Check the translation of "juste, correcte" for a decision.
--Check "passer le temps "
Hope this helps !
Bluduck2
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Modifié par lucile83 le 10-01-2014 13:56
Bug couleur
Réponse: Correction/ traduction de bluduck2, postée le 10-01-2014 à 09:29:01 (S | E)
Hello again manon 3 ,
Don't forget to correct line 3 "thing" ! and possibly turn "I did " into "I had done" .
All the best !
Bluduck2
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