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    Correction de fautes/logistics (1)

    << Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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    Correction de fautes/logistics
    Message de chacha7611 posté le 03-12-2008 à 17:12:43 (S | E | F)

    Bonjour, ayant un petit oral à préparer en anglais, pourriez vous corriger mes fautes sur le petit texte qui suit...
    Merci d'avance,
    Our article was written by Dwight Klappich on June The Fifth 2008. It deals with a new strategic function in firms : The reverse Logistics.
    Indeed, in the past most companies did not pay attention to reverse logistics processes and now it is starting to change. It is due to the green supply chain initiatives and a volition to saved dollars in this period of crisis. In fact, returns are very complicated and expensive. It is a problem for companies in both business to consumer (B2C) and business to business (B2B) environment. In US, we can estimate the reverse logistics cost between $35 billion and $100 billion per year.

    Some companies prioritise supply chain related technology investments instead of trying to make more efficient reverse logistics processes. But in this article, the author predict that it will become a higher priority for companies in few years.

    To pull away the problem of returns, some companies have decided to outsource them. But it is not a solution to get rid of a problem rather than try to understand the reasons of returns like a bad quality, an inadequate packaging, the end of the product life.

    Some advantages of a well reverse logistics can provides several opportunity for companies :
    The reduction of costs, if you understand and manage correctly the problem, cost will be decrease;
    The customer service will be improve because a company can attract new customers if they know that the company have a good customer service.
    The efficiency of the firm will increase, because there is no waste of time and money to solve these problems.


    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 03-12-2008 21:41
    titre


    Réponse: Correction de fautes/logistics de laure95, postée le 03-12-2008 à 18:27:57 (S | E)
    Bonjour, voici ce que tu dois reprendre,
    Our (pourquoi utilises-tu 1 possessif?) article was written by Dwight Klappich on June The Fifth 2008. It deals with a new strategic function in firms : The reverse Logistics.
    Indeed, in the past most companies did not pay attention to reverse logistics processes and now it is starting to change. It is due to the green supply chain initiatives and a volition ? to saved dollars in this period of crisis. In fact, returns are very complicated and expensive. It is a problem for companies in both from business to consumer (B2C) and business to business (B2B) environment. In US, we can estimate the reverse logistics cost between $35 billion and $100 billion per year.

    Some companies prioritise supply chain related to technology investments instead of trying to make more efficient reverse logistics processes. But in this article, the author predict (conjugaison!) that it will become a higher priority for companies in few years.

    To pull away the problem of returns, some companies have decided to outsource them. But it is not a solution to get rid of a problem rather than try to understand the reasons of returns like a bad quality, an inadequate packaging, the end of the product life ?.

    Some advantages of a well reverse logistics can provides several opportunity several + nom au pluriel car several = plusieurs) for companies :
    The reduction of costs, if you understand and manage correctly the problem, cost will be decrease; (problème de construction de phrase)The customer service will be improve (will be improved ou will improve?) because a company can attract new customers if they know that the company have a good customer service.
    The efficiency of the firm will increase, because there is no waste of time and money to solve these problems.

    Bon courage pour les corrections!




    Réponse: Correction de fautes/logistics de robertbrou, postée le 03-12-2008 à 19:35:41 (S | E)
    Our article was written by Dwight Klappich on June The Fifth 2008. It deals with a new strategic function in firms : The Reverse Logistics.
    Indeed, in the past most companies did not pay attention to reverse logistics processes and now it is starting to change. It is due to the green supply chain initiatives and a volition to saved dollars in this period of crisis. In fact, returns are very complicated and expensive. It is a problem for companies in both business to consumer (B2C) and business to business (B2B) environments. In the US, we can estimate the reverse logistics cost between $35 billion and $100 billion per year.

    Some companies prioritise supply chain related technology investments instead of trying to make more efficient reverse logistics processes. But in this article, the author predict that it will become a higher priority for companies in ?? few years.

    To pull away the problem of returns, some companies have decided to outsource them. But it is not a solution to get rid of a problem rather than ?? try to understand the reasons of returns like a bad quality, an inadequate packaging, the end of the product life.

    Some advantages of a well reverse logistics can provides several opportunity for companies :
    The reduction of costs, if you understand and manage correctly the problem, costs will be decrease;
    The customer service will be improve because a company can attract new customers if they know that the company have a good customer service.
    The efficiency of the firm will increase, because there is no waste of time and money to solve these problems

    ----
    ?? = something is missing
    1. When writing dates, numbers are OK. No need to spell them out.
    2. When introducing a subject, the article 'The' is not needed.
    3. 'and' is not correct because it is an opposing thought
    4. Volition is a bit old-fashioned. Use a synonym.
    5. Prioritize = US audience, Prioritise = other audience (UK, etc)
    6. subject-verb agreement
    7. To pull away ... - I'm not sure exactly what you mean.
    8. to get rid of - use synonym. Hint: it's a single word that is a French cognate.
    9. the end of the product life - delete all 'the' & rearrange wording
    10. a well - need adjective
    11. subject-verb agreement
    12. several opportunity - several means "many"
    13. See 2. Make more concise.
    14. correctly - place in correct position
    15. company have - subject-verb agreement.
    16a. subject-verb agreement. the first part of the sentence is future.
    16b. It sounds like something is missing.

    Hope this helps!





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