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    Text correction
    Message de splash posté le 17-10-2010 à 16:27:07 (S | E | F)
    Hello everybody! I need a correction for this text, please.


    How do you picture the world fifty years from now? It is a strange and difficult question, but we will try to answer that. We are used to watch on the TV mutated people who look like zombies, bionics men as in the film Terminator, aliens in flying saucers who annihilate the human race, … and there are more a lot but these are only clichés. I hope! 2060 would be filled for me with new discoveries, new progress, however, it can be scary for mankind future.


    First of all 2060 would be for me the revolution year in the matter of medical progress. The scientists will have find a vaccine against AIDS and we will be able to cure the most part cancers. We will be also a absolute comprehension of human body. It will be possible to sequence us genome to detect possible proneness gene to some fatal diseases. It implies that the death rate will be the bottommost in human history but also in downriver an overpopulation on the world.
    Secondly the world will be passed to the renewable energies because the human race will finally really became aware of global warming. In addition, the fleet of vehicles will be clean. In 2060 the mankind will have finally a environmental awareness. However it will be too late! The process of global warming has reached an advanced stage, so much so that the world will be a new face. That is to say, the melting poles, rising sea levels which result snacking coasts of every continent. A world beyond recognition! We can't say that the humankind is 100% responsible, because in the Earth's history there have been warming and glaciation periods, however it plays a part in greenhouse effect.
    Then people will likely be able to stay home to work for their companies instead going to the office. All this will be among them through a computer and an Internet connection. On the one hand it would allow more leisure time for people in their everyday life. But on the other hand in way people don't work at the same time in the day, they won't see. Therefore it will result in human relationships deterioration. This will be a new life style in a new society.
    In 50 years I believe that the Third World and developing countries will have their economic boom and will take part this situation to not be exploited but to exploit their own natural resources. Starvation and shortage situations no longer exist thanks to genetically modified food. Moreover epidemics in such countries will be reduced to nil thanks to advances in medicine.


    To conclude we can say that the future can seem reassuring in regard to progress in all areas but also worrisome level of society and human relationships. Humanity is ready for all these changes? I am not sure ... It was a glimpse of the future.


    Thanks a lot!


    Réponse: Text correction de laure95, postée le 17-10-2010 à 17:30:11 (S | E)
    Bonsoir,
    Voici ce que tu dois corriger:
    How do you picture the world fifty years from now? It is a strange and difficult question, but we will try to answer that. We are used to watch (BE USED TO + V-ING) on the TV mutated people who look like zombies, bionics men as in the film Terminator, aliens in flying saucers who annihilate the human race, … and there are more a lot but these are only clichés. I hope! 2060 would be filled for me with new discoveries, new progress, however, it can be scary for mankind future.


    First of all 2060 would be for me the revolution year in the matter of medical progress. The scientists will have find (participe passé) a vaccine against AIDS and we will be able to cure the most part cancers. We will be also a absolute comprehension of human body. It will be possible to sequence us genome to detect possible proneness gene to some fatal diseases. It implies that the death rate will be the bottommost in human history but also in downriver an overpopulation on the world.
    Secondly the world will be passed to the renewable energies because the human race will finally really became (forme) aware of global warming. In addition, the fleet of vehicles will be clean. In 2060 the mankind will have finally a (revois la règle de l'utilisation de "a") environmental awareness. However it will be too late! The process of global warming has reached an advanced stage, so much so that the world will be a new face. That is to say, the melting poles, rising sea levels which result in snacking coasts of every continent. A world beyond recognition! We can't say that the humankind is 100% responsible, because in the Earth's history there have been warming and glaciation periods, however it plays a part in greenhouse effect.
    Then people will likely be able to stay at home to work for their companies instead of going to the office. All this will be among them through a computer and an Internet connection. On the one hand it would allow more leisure time for people in their everyday life. But on the other hand in way people don't work at the same time in the day, they won't see. Therefore it will result in human relationships deterioration. This will be a new life style in a new society.
    In 50 years I believe that the Third World and developing countries will have their economic boom and will take part in this situation to not (inverser) be exploited but to exploit their own natural resources. Starvation and shortage situations no longer exist (temps) thanks to genetically modified food. Moreover epidemics in such countries will be reduced to nil thanks to advances in medicine.


    To conclude we can say that the future can seem reassuring in regard to progress in all areas but also worrisome level of society and human relationships. Humanity is ready for all these changes (revois la structure d'une question)? I am not sure ... It was a glimpse of the future.





    Réponse: Text correction de splash, postée le 17-10-2010 à 18:16:07 (S | E)
    Tout d'abord je tiens à vous remercier. Cependant quelques questions persisstent/persistent : elles sont en rouges.

    How do you picture the world fifty years from now? It is a strange and difficult question, but we will try to answer that. We are used to watching on TV mutated people who look like zombies, bionics men as in the film Terminator, aliens in flying saucers who annihilate the human race, … and there are once more but these are only clichés. I hope! 2060 would be filled for me with new discoveries, progress, however, it can be scary for mankind future.


    First of all 2060 would be for me the revolutionary year in the matter of medical progress. Scientists will have found a vaccine against AIDS and we will be able to cure all cancers. We will have also an absolute comprehension of human body. It will be possible to sequence our genome to detect possible proneness gene to some fatal diseases. It implies that the death rate will be the bottommost in human history but also in downriver an overpopulation in the world.

    Secondly the world will be (je ne vois pas?) passed to renewable energies because the human race will finally really become aware of global warming. In addition, the fleet of vehicles will be clean. In 2060 the mankind will have finally an environmental awareness. However it will be too late! The process of global warming has reached an advanced stage, so much so that the world will be a new countenance. That is to say, the melting poles, rising sea levels which result in snacking coasts of every continent. A world beyond recognition! We can't say that the humankind is 100% responsible, because in the Earth's (je ne vois pas non plus?) history there have been warming and glaciation periods, however it plays a part in greenhouse effect.

    Then people will likely be able to stay at home to work for their companies instead of going to the office. All this will be among them through a computer and an Internet connection. On the one hand it would allow more leisure time for people in their everyday life. But on the other hand in way (Comment puis-je traduire "comme" dans ce cas?) people don't work at the same time in the day, they will not see no longer (Juste?). Therefore it will result in human relationships deterioration. This will be a new life style in a new society.
    In 50 years I believe that the Third World and developing countries will have their economic boom and will take part in this situation not to be exploited but to exploit their own natural resources. Starvation and shortage situations no longer will exist thanks to genetically modified food. Moreover epidemics in such countries will be reduced to nil thanks to advances in medicine.


    To conclude we can say that the future can seem reassuring in regard to progress in all areas but also worrisome level of society and human relationships. Is humanity ready for all these changes? I am not sure ... It was a glimpse of the future.





    -------------------
    Modifié par aimen7 le 17-10-2010 21:27





    Réponse: Text correction de splash, postée le 17-10-2010 à 18:40:53 (S | E)
    Pour le comme je pourrais mettre "as". Est-ce bien cela?




    Réponse: Text correction de splash, postée le 17-10-2010 à 19:05:20 (S | E)
    Je propose dans la phrase "they will not see no longer" plutôt de mettre "they will no longer see". ?



    Réponse: Text correction de gerondif, postée le 17-10-2010 à 22:08:05 (S | E)
    Bonsoir,
    How do you picture the world fifty years from now? It is a strange and difficult question, but we will try to answer that. We are used to watching on TV mutated people who look like zombies, bionics men as in the film Terminator, aliens in flying saucers who annihilate the human race, … and there are once (beaucoup + nom pluriel many ou much ???)more but these are only clichés. I hope! 2060 would be filled for me with new discoveries, progress, however, it can be scary for mankind future(the future of mankind).


    First of all 2060 would be for me a revolutionary year in the matter of medical progress. Scientists will have found a vaccine against AIDS and we will be able to cure all cancers. We will have also an absolute comprehension of the human body. It will be possible to sequence our genome to detect possible proneness gene(pluriel) to some fatal diseases. It implies that the death rate will be the bottommost (je n'ai jamais vu ce mot)in human history but also in downriver (je ne comprends pas cette construction) an overpopulation in the world.

    Secondly the world will have passed to renewable energies because the human race will finally really become aware of global warming. In addition, the fleet of vehicles will be clean. In 2060 the mankind will have finally(devant le verbe) an environmental awareness. However it will be too late! The process of global warming has(aura atteint futur antérieur)) reached an advanced stage, so much so that the world will be a new countenance(sens? sera ou aura une nouvelle contenance). That is to say, the melting poles, rising sea levels which result in snacking (bizarre verbe)coasts of every continent. A world beyond recognition! We can't say that the humankind is 100% responsible, because in the Earth's (je ne vois pas non plus: pas de cas possessif, structure avec of)?) history there have been warming and glaciation periods, however it plays a part in greenhouse effect.

    Then people will likely be able to stay at home to work for their companies instead of going to the office. All this will be among them (sens?)through a computer and an Internet connection. On the one hand it would allow more leisure time for people in their everyday life. But on the other hand in way (Comment puis-je traduire "comme" dans ce cas? in that case ) people don't work(vous avez commencé au conditionnel, là vous êtes au présent) at the same time in the day, they will no longer see (une seule négationpar phrase). Therefore it will result in a deterioration of human relationships . This will be a new life style in a new society.
    In 50 years I believe that the Third World and developing countries will have their economic boom and will take part in this situation not to be exploited but to exploit their own natural resources. Starvation and shortage situations will no longer exist thanks to genetically modified food. Moreover epidemics in such countries will be reduced to nil thanks to advances in medicine.


    To conclude we can say that the future can seem reassuring in regard to progress in all areas but also worrisome level of (au niveau de , en ce qui concerne double cliquez sur concerne) ?society and human relationships. Is humanity ready for all these changes? I am not sure ... It was a glimpse of the future.




    Réponse: Text correction de splash, postée le 17-10-2010 à 22:57:32 (S | E)
    Bonsoir et merci pour cette contribution, revoilà le texte:


    How do you picture the world fifty years from now? It is a strange and difficult question, but we will try to answer that. We are used to watching on TV mutated people who look like zombies, bionics men as in the film Terminator, aliens in flying saucers who annihilate the human race, … and there are many more but these are only clichés. I hope! 2060 would be filled for me with new discoveries, progress, however, it can be scary for the future of mankind.

    First of all 2060 would be for me a revolutionary year in the matter of medical progress. Scientists will have found a vaccine against AIDS and we will be able to cure all cancers. We will have also an absolute comprehension of the human body. It will be possible to sequence our genome to detect possible pronenesses genes to some fatal diseases. It implies that the death rate will be the lower in human history but also an overpopulation in the world.

    Secondly the world will have passed to renewable energies because the human race will finally really become aware of global warming. In addition, the fleet of vehicles will be clean. In 2060 mankind finally will have an environmental awareness. However it will be too late! The process of global warming will have reached an advanced stage, so much so that the world will have a new face. That is to say, the melting poles, rising sea levels which result in gnawing coasts of every continent. A world beyond recognition! We can't say that humankind is 100% responsible, because in the history of Earth there have been warming and glaciation periods, however it plays a part in greenhouse effect.

    Then people will likely be able to stay at home to work for their companies instead of going to the office. All this will be enable through a computer and an Internet connection. On the one hand it would allow more leisure time for people in their everyday life. But on the other hand in that case people wouldn't work at the same time in the day, they will no longer see (une seule négationpar phrase ===> je ne vois pas comment faire à part commencer une nouvelle phrase mais cela sera dénuer de sens). Therefore it will result in a deterioration of human relationships . This will be a new life style in a new society.

    In 50 years I believe that the Third World and developing countries will have their economic boom and will take part in this situation not to be exploited but to exploit their own natural resources. Starvation and shortage situations will no longer exist thanks to genetically modified food. Moreover epidemics in such countries will be reduced to nil thanks to advances in medicine.

    To conclude we can say that the future can seem reassuring in regard to progress in all areas but also worrisome as regards society and human relationships. Is humanity ready for all these changes? I am not sure ... It was a glimpse of the future.








    Réponse: Text correction de gerondif, postée le 17-10-2010 à 23:09:55 (S | E)
    Allons-y !
    How do you picture the world fifty years from now? It is a strange and difficult question, but we will try to answer that. We are used to watching on TV mutated people who look like zombies, bionics(l'adjectif semble pourtant exister donc sans s) men as in the film Terminator, aliens in flying saucers who annihilate the human race, … and there are many more but these are only clichés. I hope! 2060 would(j'aurais mis un futur) be filled for me with new discoveries, progress, however, it can be scary for the future of mankind.

    First of all 2060 would (j'aurais mis un futur)be for me a revolutionary year in the matter of medical progress. Scientists will have found a vaccine against AIDS and we will be able to cure all cancers. We will have also an absolute comprehension of the human body. It will be possible to sequence our genome to detect possible proneness(sens de ce mot ?) genes to some fatal diseases. It implies that the death rate will be the lower (the lowest superlatif)in human history but (manque un verbe: cela impliquera aussi ...)also an overpopulation in the world.

    Secondly the world will have passed to renewable energies because the human race will finally really become aware of global warming. In addition, the fleet of vehicles will be clean. In 2060 mankind finally will have an environmental awareness. However it will be too late! The process of global warming will have reached an advanced stage, so much so that the world will have a new face. That is to say, the melting poles, rising sea levels which result in gnawing (verbe scientifique:to erode)coasts of every continent. A world beyond recognition! We can't say that humankind is 100% responsible, because in the history of Earth there have been warming and glaciation periods, however it plays a part in the greenhouse effect.

    Then people will likely be able to stay at home to work for their companies instead of going to the office. All this will be enable( remplacer par un mot tout simple:possible ) through a computer and an Internet connection. On the one hand it would(j'aurais mis un futur) allow more leisure time for people in their everyday life. But on the other hand in that case people wouldn't(j'aurais mis un futur) work at the same time in the day, they will no longer see e--h o---r(je viens enfin de comprendre le sens: ils ne se verront plus: manque le se pronom réfléchi au sens de l'un l'autre). Therefore it will result in a deterioration of human relationships . This will be a new life style in a new society.

    In 50 years I believe that the Third World and developing countries will have their economic boom and will take part in this situation not to be exploited but to exploit their own natural resources. Starvation and shortage situations will no longer exist thanks to genetically modified food. Moreover epidemics in such countries will be reduced to nil thanks to advances in medicine.

    To conclude we can say that the future can seem reassuring in regard to progress in all areas but also worrisome as regards society and human relationships. Is humanity ready for all these changes? I am not sure ... It was a glimpse of the future.



    Réponse: Text correction de splash, postée le 17-10-2010 à 23:25:11 (S | E)
    Le voilà. Par contre petite intérrogation sur la phrase en rose:


    How do you picture the world fifty years from now? It is a strange and difficult question, but we will try to answer that. We are used to watching on TV mutated people who look like zombies, bionic men as in the film Terminator, aliens in flying saucers who annihilate the human race, … and there are many more but these are only clichés. I hope! 2060 will be filled for me with new discoveries, progress, however, it can be scary for the future of mankind.

    First of all 2060 will be for me a revolutionary year in the matter of medical progress. Scientists will have found a vaccine against AIDS and we will be able to cure all cancers. We will have also an absolute comprehension of the human body. It will be possible to sequence our genome to detect possible proneness(sens de ce mot ? ===> genes de prédispositions) genes to some fatal diseases. It implies that the death rate will be the lowest in human history but it implies also an overpopulation in the world.

    Secondly the world will have passed to renewable energies because the human race will finally really become aware of global warming. In addition, the fleet of vehicles will be clean. In 2060 mankind finally will have an environmental awareness. However it will be too late! The process of global warming will have reached an advanced stage, so much so that the world will have a new face. That is to say, the melting poles, rising sea levels which result in eroding coasts of every continent. A world beyond recognition! We can't say that humankind is 100% responsible, because in the history of Earth there have been warming and glaciation periods, however it plays a part in the greenhouse effect.

    Then people will likely be able to stay at home to work for their companies instead of going to the office. All this will be possible through a computer and an Internet connection. On the one hand it will allow more leisure time for people in their everyday life. But on the other hand in that case people will not work at the same time in the day, they will no longer see themselves. Therefore it will result in a deterioration of human relationships . This will be a new life style in a new society.

    In 50 years I believe that the Third World and developing countries will have their economic boom and will take part in this situation not to be exploited but to exploit their own natural resources. Starvation and shortage situations will no longer exist thanks to genetically modified food. Moreover epidemics in such countries will be reduced to nil thanks to advances in medicine.

    To conclude we can say that the future can seem reassuring in regard to progress in all areas but also worrisome as regards society and human relationships. Is humanity ready for all these changes? I am not sure ... It was a glimpse of the future.





    Réponse: Text correction de gerondif, postée le 17-10-2010 à 23:32:29 (S | E)
    Hello !

    How many more breast cancer predisposition genes are there?
    titre internet sur google, vous auriez pu le chercher vous même !je l'ai trouvé en 10 secondes.

    they will no longer see themselves.
    erreur c'est un pronom réfléchi et non un pronom réciproque!

    I am looking at myself in the mirror. ok !
    mais:
    the two cowboys are shooting at each other: chacun tire sur l'autre.
    et normalement:
    they are looking at one another. ( quand ils sont plus de deux)

    they shot themselves: ils se sont suicidés.
    They shot at each other: chacun a tiré sur l'autre.

    Le reste va !



    Réponse: Text correction de splash, postée le 17-10-2010 à 23:39:33 (S | E)
    Et comme cela?

    How do you picture the world fifty years from now? It is a strange and difficult question, but we will try to answer that. We are used to watching on TV mutated people who look like zombies, bionic men as in the film Terminator, aliens in flying saucers who annihilate the human race, … and there are many more but these are only clichés. I hope! 2060 will be filled for me with new discoveries, progress, however, it can be scary for the future of mankind.

    First of all 2060 will be for me a revolutionary year in the matter of medical progress. Scientists will have found a vaccine against AIDS and we will be able to cure all cancers. We will have also an absolute comprehension of the human body. It will be possible to sequence our genome to detect possible predisposition genes to some fatal diseases. It implies that the death rate will be the lowest in human history but it implies also an overpopulation in the world.

    Secondly the world will have passed to renewable energies because the human race will finally really become aware of global warming. In addition, the fleet of vehicles will be clean. In 2060 mankind finally will have an environmental awareness. However it will be too late! The process of global warming will have reached an advanced stage, so much so that the world will have a new face. That is to say, the melting poles, rising sea levels which result in eroding coasts of every continent. A world beyond recognition! We can't say that humankind is 100% responsible, because in the history of Earth there have been warming and glaciation periods, however it plays a part in the greenhouse effect.

    Then people will likely be able to stay at home to work for their companies instead of going to the office. All this will be possible through a computer and an Internet connection. On the one hand it will allow more leisure time for people in their everyday life. But on the other hand in that case people will not work at the same time in the day, they will no longer see each other. Therefore it will result in a deterioration of human relationships . This will be a new life style in a new society.

    In 50 years I believe that the Third World and developing countries will have their economic boom and will take part in this situation not to be exploited but to exploit their own natural resources. Starvation and shortage situations will no longer exist thanks to genetically modified food. Moreover epidemics in such countries will be reduced to nil thanks to advances in medicine.

    To conclude we can say that the future can seem reassuring in regard to progress in all areas but also worrisome as regards society and human relationships. Is humanity ready for all these changes? I am not sure ... It was a glimpse of the future.





    Réponse: Text correction de gerondif, postée le 17-10-2010 à 23:44:21 (S | E)
    Bonne correction sur ces points.
    people will work at different times/ on different schedules,/ serait plus explicite




    Réponse: Text correction de splash, postée le 17-10-2010 à 23:45:37 (S | E)
    Dans ce cas je ne peux que vous remercier et vous souhaiter une agréable nuit.



    Réponse: Text correction de gerondif, postée le 17-10-2010 à 23:48:54 (S | E)
    Dans les films militaires, à la radio, avant de se lancer dans l'action, ça donne: "Over and out !"




    Réponse: Text correction de splash, postée le 17-10-2010 à 23:54:20 (S | E)
    Alors disons OVER AND OUT!




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