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    Oral Bac/Power

    Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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    Oral Bac/Power
    Message de olamchill posté le 20-05-2013 à 21:02:51 (S | E | F)
    Bonsoir

    j'aurais besoin d'une aide à la correction pour ma préparation d'oral s'il vous plait. C'est assez urgent car je passe mes oraux jeudi, merci de votre aide

    - The notion of power implies a basic division in a society between those who have and exercise power and those who have none of little of it.
    - Power is a very broad term, can be practice in different ways. Por example the physical strength, it's a power who allows the law of more stronger or the power of money who allows the corruption. A person dominates on an other, in all situations.
    - For understand the notion “places and forms of power” we studied the place of the university in our society.
    - we will see why university is a seat off power. At first, I will explain the power given to the individual and secondly the power granted by education.

    - Today, the university in United Kingdom is very selective. In fact, in two thousand ten, there was many demonstrations in London.
    - They demonstrated because the British government has decided to increase the tuition fees.
    - The social hierarchies emerge because the entry is not possible for all.
    - Emilie Adams and James Bartle, members of the youth parliament debated about this question.
    - Emilie Adams is against the rise of tuition fees, she states that the wealthiest students will obtain the best degrees. So she underlines rising of tuition fees will put aside under privileged students
    - James Bartle defends the governmental project. For him, the financial situation of the universities in the United Kingdom is at stake. Universities have to reduce their deficit. For James Bartle, students must accept to pay more expensive fees if tget want to be educated.

    - Secondly, we can say that university gives a power to the young students.
    - They can envisage freely their careers and become what they want to be in their future life.
    - We studied the academic record of Crystal, an American students.
    - It's a model of academic record who shows of the motivate student can succeed with an hard working.
    - Crystal was given scholarships but that was not enough so she had several add jobs with 3 part-time jobs.
    - She worked up to 60 hours a week for pay her higher education.

    - I think that the rise of tuition fees is a bad thing. The government closes the door to many students.
    - Even for the government, there is a negative aspect because many students choose a less expansive alternative for continue their studies.
    - They go in college or some leave the country, for example in Scotland, they are called the “fee refugees”.
    - Also in France, university is inexpensive and all social classes can access at higher education. This system is more democratic than in England.

    - To conclude, university is a seat of power because she gives a power of students who can choose freely their future life, studies but we see that the government keep the power (face?) to students, as show the rise of tuition fees. Power is defines by a dominant and dominated

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 20-05-2013 21:33



    Réponse: Oral Bac/Power de gnanga, postée le 21-05-2013 à 18:40:43 (S | E)
    Hi Olamchill

    First of all, where is your introduction? no transition between one part to another part

    the errors are in blue:

    - The notion(idea is better;notion pas souvent utilisé) of power involves a basic division in a society between those who have andwield or exercise power and those who have none of little of itdo not.
    - Power is a very broad term, it can be practice in different ways. por example the physical strength,is a power who allows the law of more stronger or the power of money who allows the corruption. A person dominates on anhaving control over others, in all situations.
    - For understand the notion “places and forms of power” we are going to study the place of the university in our society.
    - we will see why university is a seat off power. First of all, I will explain the power given to the individual and secondly the power granted by education.

    - Today, the university in United Kingdom is very selective. Indeed, in 2010, there was many demonstrations in London.
    - They demonstrated because the British government has decided to increase the tuition fees.
    - The social hierarchies emerge because the entry is not possible for all.
    - Emilie Adams and James Bartle, members of the Youth Parliament discussed (is better) about this question.
    - Emilie Adams is against the rise of tuition fees, she states that the wealthiest students Have to obtain the best degrees. So she underlines rising of tuition fees will put aside under privileged students
    - James Bartle defends the governmental project. From his point of view, the financial situation of the universities in the United Kingdom is at stake. Universities have to reduce their deficit. For James Bartle, students must accept to pay more expensive fees if tget want to be educated.

    - Secondly, we can say that university gives a power to the young students.
    - They can envisage freely their careers and becoming what they want to be in their future life.
    - We studied the academic record of Crystal, an American students.
    - It's a model of academic record who shows of the most talented can succeed with an hard working.
    - Crystal was given scholarships but that was not enough so she had several add jobs with 3 part-time jobs.
    - She worked up to 60 hours a week in order to pay her higher education.

    - I think that the rise of tuition fees is a bad thing. The government closes the door to many students.
    - Even for the government, there is a negative aspect because many students choose a less expansive alternative for continue their studies.
    - They go in college or some of them leave the country, for example in Scotland, they are called the “fee refugees”.
    - Also in France, university is inexpensive and all social classes can access at higher education. This system is more democratic than in England.

    - To conclude, university is a seat of power because it gives strength(better in that case) of students who can choose freely their future life, studies(verb or noun) but we see that the government keep the power (face?)(what do you mean in french) to students, as is shown in the rise of tuition fees. Power is defines by a dominant and dominated

    Dear lucile!!!
    -------------------
    Modifié par gnanga le 21-05-2013 18:42

    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 21-05-2013 21:25
    Dear Lucile n'a pas le temps de relire votre correction mais j'y reviendrai pour voir si elle est fiable
    ...je viens de voir ça : ...university is a seat of power because she gives ...
    Vous laissez passer de telles fautes!?



    Réponse: Oral Bac/Power de olamchill, postée le 25-05-2013 à 12:54:18 (S | E)
    merci beaucoup pour votre aide




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