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    Notion/Spaces and exchanges

    Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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    Notion/Spaces and exchanges
    Message de soweirdness posté le 26-04-2017 à 16:48:05 (S | E | F)
    Bonjour ,
    j'ai rédigé ma notion et voi le retour de ma prof : bonne problématique et arguments adaptés. Attention aux fautes d'anglais, notamment à la construction de tes phrases. Vérifie que tu as un sujet, éventuellement un auxiliaire, un verbe, un complément (et non 2 sujets, 2 verbes...)
    J'ai du mal à appliquer cette consigne pouvez-vous m'aider !
    Merci pour vos réponses.

    Anglais Notion 3- Spaces and exchanges| Borderlands
    Intro: I am going to talk about the notion of Spaces and exchanges . I’m going to be interested in the of migration, fixing the emigration from latin america to united states.
    First of all i would like to give a defition of this notion : This notion deals with the geographical ans symbolic aeras that all societies occupy and Exhanges are manifested in diferrent domains : social, cultural, economic , linguistic etc..
    So now i will try to explain :how do migrants adapt to new spaces ?
    First, i will talk about the motivation of migrants to in search of american dream. Then it can be hard to pass from dream to reality.

    Dev’: partie 1 : Migrants can cross the border for several reasons : politics,war,social etc.. But the main motivation remain econmic.
    I'm going to talk about the document the picture of a cover of the magazine "Business week" entitled "Embracing illegals". It is focused on immigration in the USA. We can see that the picture of this cover is divided into two parts with in the middle a man who looks like a Mexican, and there is a contrast between the first and the second part.
    In the first part, we can see in the background a no man's land with barbed wire that seems to be the Mexico-United States border and in the foreground the man who's crossing the border and he is wearing dirties clothes and carrying a bag. While, in the second part the man carrying a shopping bag, he is wearing smart clothes and shoes and he seems happy, he smiles, and in the background we can see a perfect lawn with many beautiful American home and a blue sky.
    Moreover, in the first part, the man walks in the soil, the sand and it's dark because it's the sunset while .
    In my opinion, through the contrast between the landscape, and the man's clothes, this cover of magazine shows the change of lifestyle and of living environment thanks to the work that the USA offers an immigrant. We can say that in the second part, the immigrant realized his "American dream". I have the feeling that this cover can give hope but is ironic too because this not the reality.
    The hope to live the American dream made of immigrants individuals wanting all costs to settle in the USA even if it means to cross the line of legality and to face disillusionment.

    Partie 2: It’s can be hard and difficult to adapt to a new spaces. The document The Other Side of the coin can illustrate this mention.
    America and candido are two illegals immigrants who arrived to the USA to realize the American dream and have a better one future. America hope to find a job and to earn money thanks to an adress given by a woman for a job of sewing. They sleep outside and this job coulb bring him opportunities even if she will affect only low wages. But not speaking English and streets being alike all, her it is fast lost. She go trough many moments difficult and feels really alone.
    She moves quickly from happy to worried that the police would find her and the arrest because she undoccumented.
    So America and candido’s story illustrate the notion of Spaces and exchanges on the hand for their immigration for better prospects reinforce the economy and the jpb market with menial jobs which improve to the country’s development.
    On the other hand, the migrants community is rejected, left out,despise. It would be necessary to put everyone on an equal fasting and integrate migrants and give them even nights.

    Conclusion: To conclude , migrants cross the border because they need and believe to a better live. That can be hard’ dangerous and difficult to adapt because the american dream can be stay only a dream. I have the feeling that migrants can contribuate and bring something to a state.


    -------------------
    Modifié par lucile83 le 28-04-2017 22:38


    Réponse : Notion/Spaces and exchanges de laure95, postée le 27-04-2017 à 18:10:04 (S | E)
    Bonsoir,
    Intro: I’m going to be interested in the of (enlever the et of)migration, fixing the emigration from latin america (majuscule)to (article)united states (majuscules).
    First of all i (majuscule) would like to give a defition of this notion : This notion deals with the geographical ans symbolic aeras (orthographe)that all societies occupy and Exhanges (orthographe)are manifested in diferrent (orthographe)
    - So now i will try to explain :how do migrants adapt to new spaces ?
    - to (pas de to) in search of (article)american (majuscule) dream.

    Dev’: partie 1 : politics (mettre l'adjectif),war,social etc.. But the main motivation remain (faute de conjugaison)econmic (orthographe).
    - I'm going to talk about the document (enlever the document) the picture of (on pas of)a cover of the magazine
    - with in the middle a man who looks like a Mexican (man)
    - with (article)barbed wire
    - the man who's crossing the border and he (enlever and et he)is wearing dirties clothes and carrying a bag.
    - While, in the second part the man carrying a shopping bag, he (,enlever la virgule et he)is wearing smart clothes
    -he smiles: mettre au présent be+-ing.
    - many beautiful American home (utiliser le mot house)
    - the man walks (présente en be+-ing)in (pas la bonne préposition)the soil, the sand and it's dark because it's the (enlever the) sunset while .
    -and of (enlever of)living environment thanks to the work (utiliser job) that the USA offers (passé + il manque to)an immigrant.
    - the immigrant (has) realized his "American dream".
    - this (mettre un verbe)not the reality.

    - The hope to live the American dream made of (enlever of)immigrants (becoming) individuals wanting (at) all costs (pas de s)

    - Partie 2: It’s (enlever 's)can be hard and difficult to adapt to
    - a new spaces: a + singulier.
    - America and candido are two illegals (pas de s) immigrants who arrived to (pas la bonne préposition) the USA
    - have a better one (enlever one) future.
    - America hope (faute de conjugaison) to find a job
    - coulb
    - bring him (them: ils sont 2)opportunities even if she (qui est she?)will affect only low wages.
    - But not speaking English and streets being alike all, her it is fast lost: ?
    - She go (faute de conjugaison)trough many moments difficult (inverser les mots)
    - She moves quickly from happy (mettre le nom)to worried (mettre le nom) that the police would find her
    - and the arrest: she is afraid to be arrested
    - because she (il manque le verbe be conjugué)undoccumented.
    - So America and candido’s story illustrate (faute de conjugaison)the notion of Spaces and exchanges
    - on the one hand for their immigration for better prospects: ?
    - despise (participe passé).
    - on an equal fasting (foot pas fasting)and (nelever and)integrate migrants
    - and give them even nights: ?

    Conclusion: because they need and believe to a better live (life pas live).
    - the american (majuscule) dream can be (enlever be)stay (utiliser remain)only a dream. I have the feeling that migrants can contribuate (contribute)


    Fais des phrases courtes! Tu fais des phrases trop longues, qu'on ne comprend pas toujours!



    Réponse : Notion/Spaces and exchanges de soweirdness, postée le 27-04-2017 à 18:53:25 (S | E)
    D'accord merci beaucoup de ton aide!




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